Uncomfortable, I didn’t know what to say. He was so much more worldly than I was. Maybe he was right. I didn’t know anything. I have caused so much trouble for him and his friends. Even his own brother thought I wasn’t good enough. I didn’t want to be a burden to anyone.
Getting to my feet, I walked over to the front door and put on my shoes as tears rolled down my face. It hurt so much knowing I was about to leave him, and I didn’t know why. I didn’t know where I would go, but I wouldn’t be a burden any longer. I couldn’t do that to him. Reaching for the door, Balthazar spoke up. “Where are you going?”
Sniffing, I whispered. “I’m leaving. I don’t want to be a problem to anyone. It was wrong of me to ask you these things. You have your own life. You need to return to that. I need to learn where I belong. Grimm was right. I don’t know anything. I never did. This whole world is different from where I come from. It’s strange and scary. I…”
“What if I want you to stay?”
Turning, I looked at the man who turned his whole life upside down for me. Though I knew staying would only be more burdensome for him, I couldn’t deny him anything. Yet, I needed a reason, anything. “Why?”
Watching him get to his feet, I stayed where I was as he walked over to me. I said nothing as he gently wiped my eyes, then took my hands in his. He then looked me in the eyes and asked, “I don’t know where you belong either, Aariaani, but I know I would never forgive myself if I let you walk out that door.”
“Then why stop me?”
“I don’t know.” He whispered as he gently put a hand on my neck and guided his mouth to mine.
My stomach was in knots. Like little butterflies were flapping their wings furiously, trying to get out. My heart was beating fast. I was sure he could hear it. Yet, he stayed before me, not moving, his lips hovering right before mine.
“Tell me to stop.”
“I can’t,” I whispered.
Then I felt his soft lips on mine, and it was a direct line to the center of my legs. I instantly wanted more. I’d never felt anything so tender, so soft before. He tasted like mint and the fresh air. He was gentle yet commanding, and then because I didn’t know what else to do, I moaned, moving my mouth against his. I was lost within his embrace as he held me to him. I was just about to touch him when he released me.
Gasping, I said nothing as soft tears rolled down my cheeks. His kiss was the most beautiful experience of my life. I’d never felt so loved, so cherished. His kiss broke my heart and shattered my soul. His hands, still holding my head close to his as he looked into my eyes. I felt him tremble before he said, “I’m not a strong man. Never was. So, God please forgive me for what I am about to do.”
I didn’t know what he meant by that. I was about to ask when his lips found mine again.
My experience was minimal. I was still a virgin. He was the first man I ever kissed. I had never met anyone who made me feel the way Balthazar did. I never wanted him to stop. I wanted more, anything he could teach me. My mind was swirling. I couldn’t think about anything but pleasing him. I’d never felt this way before, and I knew he felt something too. I wasn’t asking him for forever. He said he couldn’t give it and I believed him, but he could give me this now.
I needed this. I wanted to know what it felt like to surrender myself to a man of my choosing. To be totally his, even if it was for a short time.
Balthazar lifted me up off the floor, cradling me to his warm body, as his lips never left mine. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I never wanted to let him go. I didn’t know what would happen next, but I couldn’t wait to find out.
My whole body was tingling, and my face was flushed as he gently laid me on the bed and quickly removed the t-shirt I was wearing, baring my nakedness to him.
“God damn baby, you are fucking beautiful.”
“Teach me,” I whispered as Balthazar moved his hands down my body, sending flashes of heat shooting through me. Everywhere he touched became electrified. I moaned against his touch. I watched as he removed my shoes, then kissed his way up my legs. I’d never seen a man do that before. Touch a woman so tenderly. I was spellbound by him. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. He was the most beautiful man I’d ever seen.
Balthazar sighed, leaning over me. “What do you want to learn?”
“Everything.”
Kissing me again, I pressed myself closer to him, needing his touch as he removed the tie from my hair. His hands combed through my hair tenderly as it fell down around my shoulders and on the bed beneath me.
Balthazar leaned down and kissed a trail along my neck and down to my breasts. “Your tits are perfect. So soft and round. Your pretty pink nipples are begging me to kiss them. Would you like that? Do you want me to kiss them?”
“Yes, kiss them.”
“Kiss what, baby. Tell me.”
“Kiss my nipples.” I blushed saying the word for the first time. I didn’t know why I was embarrassed but I was. I’d never used language like that before. It was strange, yet with Balthazar, I felt comfortable.
He took one in his hand and put his lips around my nipple. He took his time pleasing me, sucking, and flicking my nipples with his tongue, alternating between his fingers and mouth on my breasts. Then Balthazar moved over to my other breast and did the same thing.
I never knew my nipples could be so sensitive.
Kissing my stomach, he moved further down, quickly ripping my panties from my body as he slowly spread my legs apart. He moved his head between my knees and kissed my inner thighs, starting above my knee and making a trail just before he touched my core.