There was more between them than she had realized. She didn’t know what it was, didn’t know how long it would last, but the one thing she was sure of was that when it ended, it was going to hurt. Bad.
She’d walked into this, completely sure of herself and her decision. Nicole had been so certain she could have a little fling without letting her heart get involved. Turned out that she just wasn’t the have-an-orgasm-or-two-and-move-on kind of girl.
“Oh, God.”
“Sweetie...”
She came up out of her thoughts to see soft concern and worry in Sandy’s eyes. That pride she and Griffin had fought over reared its head.
Instantly, Nicole shook her head. “This is exactly why I didn’t want anyone knowing what Griffin and I were doing. You’re different, of course, since you knew even before anything had happened, but Sandy, if you feel sorry for me now, I might scream. Or cry. And I don’t want to do either.”
“Yeah,” her friend said, “but I don’t like knowing you’re setting yourself up for pain.”
“Not my favorite thing, either,” Nicole admitted, already dreading the misery she’d feel when whatever it was she shared with Griffin was over. “No, I went into this with my eyes open, and they’re still open.”
“That’s the problem, isn’t it?” Sandy asked.
Sighing, Nicole admitted, “Probably. I can see the end coming, Sandy.”
“It doesn’t have to end.”
Nicole laughed shortly. “No sympathy or delusions, thanks. Of course it has to end. I’ve known that all along. It’s my own fault if I let myself forget that, even for a second.”
Taking a deep breath, Nicole changed the subject, because she really couldn’t take much more of Sandy’s warm, sympathetic gaze. Pretty soon she’d start feeling sorry for herself and where would that get her? Nowhere.
“So—” She tapped one finger on the sheet of paper she had slid in front of Sandy a few minutes before. “How about instead of my love life, we talk about this order from your supplier for the week’s flour and sugar? I couldn’t make out the amount at the bottom of the bill. Your handwriting sucks. Haven’t we talked about you entering all of your bills on the computer?”
As if understanding that her friend was close to the edge, Sandy picked up the paper and smiled. “But if I did that, I wouldn’t need you, would I?”
“Good point.” The only reason Nicole had a successful business was because her clients unilaterally loathed or were confused by the bookkeeping software available.
While Sandy studied her own handwriting as if it was hieroglyphics, Nicole thought about Griffin. Again. About the end that was coming and about the nights she still had to look forward to.
She was making memories, she told herself. Memories that would both comfort and torment her long after this affair with Griffin was over.
* * *
“Are the new cabinets in yet?”
“What?” Griffin looked at Nicole over the dinner table. This was getting so damn comfortable, he could hardly remember sitting in his empty condo with a nuked dinner and the sound of silence hanging over him. Funny, but he really wasn’t looking forward to having his nights to himself anymore. Okay, maybe that wasn’t funny, but it was a little unnerving.
“The cabinets?” she repeated.
“Oh. The cabinets.” He nodded and told himself to pay attention. “Yeah, they’re in.”
And they were light oak instead of pine, but she hadn’t asked him that, had she? He frowned down at his dessert. He wasn’t sorry he’d been upgrading Nicole’s kitchen, but he could at least admit to himself that he was beginning to regret lying to her about it.
“Oh, good. Then the counter should be going in soon, right?”
“Yeah, in a few days.” The granite guy they were working with was still searching for the right stone that would match the description Nicole had given Griffin when she’d described her dream kitchen. “They’re putting the floor in tomorrow, though.”
Nodding, Nicole leaned over Connor and dropped a few sliced strawberries onto his high-chair tray. Instantly, the boy made a lunge for them.