How did Sadie think that walking away was easy?
Nothing about this was easy.
“When are you going to admit you miss her?”
“When are you going to butt out of my life?”
“When you stop making a mess of it.” Gabe leaned forward. “Sadie’s not Marcy.”
Ethan drew in a deep breath and settled the blast of anger he felt at Gabe throwing his past at him. He was right, though. Sadie was nothing like Marcy. Sadie would stand up and tell him what she was thinking. Marcy had kept her resentments to herself. Hadn’t told him that she was unhappy. Not that their marriage’s failure was her fault. He hadn’t put the time in and he knew it. What he realized now was that a woman like Sadie wouldn’t have put up with him ignoring her.
But Sadie wasn’t the problem, was she? It was him. Ethan was the same man who’d made a mess of his marriage, so how could he know this time would be different?
“And you’re not the same, either,” Gabe said, as if reading Ethan’s thoughts. “Sadie changed you.”
Change. Used to be Ethan hated that word. Now, he could almost see the good in it. He had changed. For the better?
How was he to know?
“I’m just saying,” Gabe added, as he stood up, “you might want to try to fix this before the chance gets away from you.”
“I think it’s too late already,” Ethan murmured, remembering the look on Sadie’s face before she’d left his house. Not only had he let her go, he’d practically shoved her out the door. Why would she be willing to walk back in?
“Yeah,” Gabe said, “but you won’t know until you try.”
Eleven
Josh was nice.
At any other point in her life, Sadie would have really enjoyed him. The man was gorgeous, seriously built, and he had a great smile and a wonderful sense of humor. In short, he was everything she should have wanted. Sadly, the one thing he was not was Ethan.
Sitting across from him at the diner, Sadie listened while he talked about the fire station and the guys he worked with. But instead of hearing him, she was thinking of Ethan. Wondering what he was doing. How he was feeling. Did he miss her or was he counting his blessings to be rid of her? God, that was a horrible thought.
“Hey,” Josh said, distracting her. “Are you okay?”
“I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “Yes, I’m fine. I’m just...tired, I think.”
Sunlight slanted through the window and lay across the bright red Formica tabletop. Just across the street was the ocean, shining in the winter sun, and the crowds on Pacific Coast Highway belied the winter cold. Nothing stopped Californians from enjoying the beach.
Sadie just wished she was in the mood to enjoy anything. Maybe Gina was right, she told herself. Maybe she’d done enough sulking. How long could she mourn a love that hadn’t happened? Was she going to wither up and spend her life sulking? Wind up alone with a houseful of cats? The best way to forget a particular man was in seeing another one, right? Well, Josh was a good place to start. She didn’t even like cats.
“We can do this another day,” he said with a shrug.
“No, really. I’m okay.” She shrugged off her dark thoughts, pushed Ethan completely out of her mind and focused on the man opposite her. “And I’m interested. Tell me why you decided to become a firefighter.”
He grinned. “It’s always dangerous asking a man to talk about himself. We could go on for hours.”
Sadie laughed. “I’ll risk it.”
Josh started talking then, and this time she really tried to pay attention. But less than a minute later, Ethan walked into the diner, carrying Emma against his chest, and Sadie was lost.
Following her shocked gaze, Josh looked over his shoulder, then back to her. “What’s going on? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something.”
“Or something,” she said, wondering what was going on. Her heartbeat was racing and her mouth was dry. Her stomach did a quick spin and flip, and she had to fight to keep her coffee down.
Ethan strode up to their table and completely ignored Josh as he said, “Honey, don’t do this.”
“What?” Sadie blurted.