Chapter 30
Leda
I rounded on Lucas the moment my brother left, seeing the wariness in his eyes as I did so. I was still hot about my argument with Nico. He had suffered, same as me, under our father. But he got away. Now, he was willing to throw himself back into the fray. He didn’t need to. All he had to do was stay under protection and he would remain safe.
He could turn his face and pretend that this was just a bad dream.
I still woke up at night in cold sweat, wondering if my father had found me. I was scared that at any moment, my father was going to take my child from me, and take me away from Lucas.
That was why he couldn’t live. That was why I had to be the one to kill him.
“How dare you side with him?” I demanded.
Lucas didn’t look angry but resigned. “Leda, your brother is right. When you kill, you can’t come back from it. Trust me. I have so many deaths weighing me down, and I see every single fucking one when I close my eyes at night. It’s not something you want on your soul or your conscience.”
“There’s no other way,” I bit out, the tears clogging my throat. “He was going to give me to someone I didn’t even know, Lucas! I was nothing more than a signature to seal a contract! He would throw me to a monster, let him and all his men rape me if it meant he got just a sliver more power!”
Lucas let out a slow breath and held out his hand. “Will you let me show you something?”
I hesitated. I wasn’t in the mood for anything other than plotting my father’s death and worming my way back into the meetings with the capos. I had worked too hard to get here, to finally feel like I could get a step up on my father, and everyone was attempting to take that from me.
“Please?” Lucas urged. “Don’t shut me out, Leda.”
I couldn’t do that. I didn’t want to shut him out. I wanted him to be my partner in this, to see where I was coming from and know that it wasn’t because I wanted to kill anyone. I just wanted my father dead.
So, I took his hand, and he led me up the stairs and into the apartment, shutting the door behind us. He led me over to the bed. “Sit,” he said.
Curious, I did as he asked and watched as he rummaged through the small wardrobe where we had been storing our stuff. “I should have shown you this sooner,” he started as he sat next to me, holding out a small black bag. “But something always got in the way.”
I didn’t know what was in the bag, but my heart started a slow thud against my rib cage regardless. When he dumped out the contents, I was puzzled. “What is it?” I asked, peering into his palm.
Lucas chuckled. “Well, it was a ring.”
I felt like someone punched me in the chest.
A ring.
Right now, it looked like a shattered diamond, the pieces glittering in the low light of the room.
“I was going to propose to you the day you left,” he started out. “The day I sent you away. I got scared, Leda, that maybe I wasn’t good enough for you.”
My breath lodged painfully in my lungs at his admission. He had thought about marrying me, about keeping me. I had been so devastated that he was sending me away that day, the day that had changed everything for us, but now he was telling the awful truth about what had happened and why he had done it.
“I knew what I had,” he continued, turning over the diamonds in his palm. “But I wasn’t so sure you would be happy with me. I had no means to protect you, and I’ve fucked up more times than I care to count. Even this”
“What happened?” I forced out, swallowing past the lump in my throat. This Lucas was one that I struggled to accept, only because I didn’t know what to do with him truly. Lucas had been all darkness and anger when we first met, and he had dominated me.
Now he was far too vulnerable, and every bone in my body wanted to comfort him.
He looked at me, a lock of his hair falling over his forehead. “I tucked it into my pocket so I wouldn’t have to look at it. When I was shot, the bullet meant for my heart was stopped by this.”
Oh God. He hadn’t told me how close he had come to dying that day!
“Lucas…”
“It was you,” he rushed on. “You saved my life. Even when I thought I’d lost you for good.”