“It wasn’t Raymond’s fault,” he spoke through clenched teeth. “She chose.”
Gretchen sighed “I know. Ronnie’s girls don’t always get that luxury though, do they?”
He narrowed his eyes on hers, but he didn’t answer. They’d made a deal, here in this bedroom, that she wouldn’t ask him for information, and though it hadn’t been her intention, she’d come too close to the truth.
She nodded slowly before she turned back to her bag and zipped it. Despite what he’d said about her being the only one who really knew him, she’s begun to think the Finn she thought she knew didn’t exist. When it came down to it, Finn would choosethislife over her every time.
“Where are you going?” he asked when she picked up her bag and strode to the door of his bedroom.
“I have to get back to my real life. When I spend too much time here, I forget this is make believe.” She didn’t turn toward him. She didn’t have the strength to look into those gray eyes and resist his con.
“Gretchen.”
She paused with her hand on the knob, but she didn’t look at him. He gripped her shoulder and turned her. His hand slid from her shoulder to her neck and his fingers stretched out to tangle in her curly hair. He brought her mouth to his and kissed her firmly, before he eased back and let his tongue wrestle lazily with hers. She surrendered. Already she’d learned she couldn’t fight her feelings for him. When he touched her like this, she could almost believe he loved her . . . almost.
Putting her hands on his chest, she ignored the warmth that radiated through her palms and forced herself to push him away. “I have to go. That’s one way we’re different, huh? I have to float back and forth, and you get to hide out here forever.”
“I’m not hiding. This is me, Gretchen.”
“A part of you, maybe, but it’s not all of you.” It couldn’t be. She couldn’t love him like this if a con-man and enforcer were all he was. Could she?No.
“You’re a good man. I’ve always known that. Maybe one day I’ll understand you.” Lifting to her toes, she kissed him gently and then walked away.
Chapter 8
“Christensen, in my office . . . now!”
Gretchen looked up as her captain marched past her desk and into his office. He left the door open for her to follow. She glanced at Neil, who stared back at her, his brows disappearing into his dark hair, before she slowly rose and did as she was told. Even after five years on the job, following orders went against her instincts.
“Shut the door,” Carpenter snapped as she walked in.
Swallowing, she pulled the door closed behind her, then trudged across the room to stand by his desk.
“Sit,” he barked.
She suppressed an eye roll as she slid into the chair.
“I’ve received intel from our deep cover.” He steepled his fingers under his pointy chin.
“As you should.” She nodded as if the idea didn’t bother her.
“He knows who you are. He’s reported about you as well.” He glared at her.
She didn’t react, she’d been trained too well not to. “And?”
“And is there anything you want to tell me, so I don’t think you were tryingnotto tell me?”
She’d expected this. Sooner or later someone would find out she’d slept with Finn. Under normal circumstances, she wouldn’t have minded offering information about who she was sleeping with, but these were far from normal circumstances.
“I suppose you mean me sleeping with Jay Finley.” She relaxed into the chair and rested an arm on the back as she crossed her legs. “It’s true, I am. Is that a problem?”
Damn right, it was a problem, not that other agents hadn’t done similar things in the past. Their team didn’t always follow typical rules and procedures, but they always got the job done. Unfortunately, the rules tended to be slightly different when it came to the only female agent.
“Why are you sleeping with him?” Carpenter seemed genuinely surprised.
“Other than you ordering me to sleep with someone?” Okay maybe he hadn’t ordered her to actually sleep with someone, but he’d put the idea out there.
“You know that’s not what I said.”