He had a hundred fantasies. Locked away inside himself, his defense against the invasion of his body. The invasion of his soul.
They hadn’t protected him completely, but they had given him a place to go.
The only question was, which one would he live out tonight, with her.
He bit her lip, testing her. Seeing what she would call a stop to. What she would enjoy. The slight bite only earned him a whimper, one of desire, not pain.
“You like that?” he asked.
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Good.” He stepped away from her, took one last look at her in the dress. “Take that off. Slowly.”
Her cheeks darkened, but she obeyed, reaching around behind herself. Her dress loosened, the top falling to her waist. She was wearing a black bra, plain and sexy, her breasts spilling over the low cups, so pale against the dark fabric.
“All the way,” he said.
She tugged at the fabric around her hips and the dress fell away, a dark, shimmering pool at her feet. Then she stepped out of it, leaving her in nothing more than the bra, a very small pair of matching panties and her spiky shoes.
They made her legs look endless. He wanted them wrapped around his back. Yes, that would have to happen. A definite fantasy.
She didn’t make a move to him. She just stood there, her body on display for him, awaiting her next order.
He moved to her, put his hand on her cheek. “You are so much better than beautiful.”
“What does that mean?” she asked, her voice shaking.
“You are beautiful, but there is something in you. Something that shines from inside. That is what makes me want to lose control with you. Because I want to touch the light. I want to feel warm. You will make me feel warm.”
Then she was pulling him to her, kissing him. There was something unrestrained in her, something totally different than anything in his past experience. She was hungry for him, but it wasn’t in the same way other women had been with him.
She was just so very soft. Sweet, if anything so torturously sensual could be called that.
He sucked her tongue deep into his mouth, and she moaned, her fingers digging in to his shoulders.
He reached around and undid the catch on her bra, then slid his hands down her back, beneath the waistband of her underwear, cupping her bare butt. He squeezed her gently, enjoying her body, not simply giving it enjoyment.
Always for him, sex had been clinical. The go-to images in his mind keeping his body on track. But not now. Now, there was nothing that could have doused his arousal, no way to stop it from consuming him, leading him deeper and deeper down a dark path that he had to see through to the end. Even though he couldn’t see in front of him. Even though he knew nothing good waited. Not past the oblivion that would come with release.
None of it mattered. All that mattered was her. Was this. Was getting what he wanted.
He pulled away from her and tugged at the front of her bra, drawing it down beneath her breasts, exposing her to him. She was so perfect. Pink and perfect. He lowered his head and slid his tongue over one nipple, felt it harden. Then he sucked her deep into his mouth, savoring her, the flavor, the way she arched into him, the way she grabbed his hair and held him to her body as though she couldn’t bear to be separated from him.
All things that had disgusted him when it had been with a woman he didn’t want. A woman he was, in some ways, forced to be with. With Julia, they made him burn. He craved more.
It was like a beast had been unleashed inside him, and after more than ten years of celibacy, more than ten years of starving himself, he was very, very hungry. He sucked her in deeper, before releasing it and turning his attention to the other breast, giving her the same attention there.
But it wasn’t enough. He rose, claimed her lips again, then he picked her up and held her close to his chest. She squeaked and held on to him tight, but didn’t break the kiss. Her nails dug into his neck, a delicious bite of pain to go with the almost unendurable pleasure.
So delicious it ramped up his appetite all the more.
He deposited her on the bed and stood at the foot of it. “Lie down.” She obeyed, sliding her bra off the rest of the way and holding still. “Part your thighs for me.”
Again she obeyed. He knelt on the edge of the bed and let his fingers drift over her panties, rubbing her through the fabric.