I park my Jeep in one of the empty spaces, listening to the engine do its gurgle as I switch it off. It’s going to have to go to the shop soon and before winter sets in, but it’s an expense I just don’t want to think about now.
I turn around in my seat and look at Josh, who’s “‘reading.’” I pluck the book, Good Night, Gorilla, from his hand and give it back right side up.
“We’ll have to return that to the library today.”
“Okay.”
“Do you know what you want to read next?”
“Skippyjon Jones and the Big Bones!”
“Again?”
He nods enthusiastically, his smile widening. His chocolate eyes sparkle, and he gets that dimple in his right cheek, and I falter, my heart giving a little flutter as it skips a beat. He looks so much like Lev. He didn’t at first. When he was born, his eyes were a deep blue, and he didn’t look like either of us, but I swear every day he’s more and more like his father.
“Alright then. Ready for school, kiddo?”
“Yep.”
I climb out of the front seat, zip my coat against the cold Colorado wind, and open the back door. Josh holds his arms out for me to unstrap him and lift him out. It’s too hard for him to get out of the buckles of the car seat just yet.
I slip my hands under his pudgy arms. The puffy coat makes him look like the Michelin Man.
Lifting him out, I give him a little squeeze, then set him on the ground and grab his Minions backpack, which is empty but for his lunch. I unzip it, slip his book inside, close the door, and take his small hand in mine. He’ll need new gloves for winter too. His little fingers are already cold.
“We’ll go get some gloves after school too.”
“After the library?”
“After the library,” I say as we walk to the front entrance of the school.
A whisper on the wind has me turning toward the woods that border the back of the property. Dense pines make it impossible for light to penetrate, and for a moment, I think I see movement.
It’s been like this for the past few weeks. I’ve felt it like I did before, that raising of the hairs on the back of my neck. That slight scent that I don’t know if I imagine or if it just happens to be someone else wearing the same aftershave Lev wore. I don’t even know how I still remember that detail and wish I could forget.
“Miss Katie!” a little girl calls out, making me jump.
I turn away from the woods.
I’m just on edge because of the anniversary. Because today is the day Nina and her family were killed. Well, tonight is. It’s the night I found out I was pregnant with Lev’s baby. The night I’d gone to her house for help when she slipped that flash drive into my hand and made me leave, made me promise not to come back until she called me.
She never did call.
The house burned down that night, and three charred bodies were found inside. Foul play. Arson. Bullets.
“What do you say, Katie?”
I give a shake of my head. Katie. Sometimes I forget to answer to it.
“I’m sorry?” I ask.
“Why don’t you and Josh come over for dinner next week on Friday? It’s Emma’s half-birthday, and we’re getting a cake,” Emma’s dad, Luke Foreman, says. He’s a nice guy. In his mid-forties, he lost his wife early to cancer.
“Can we, Mommy?” Josh asks. He tugs on my hand, and I lean down. He raises his eyebrows and leans in close. “There’s cake,” he whispers loudly.
Luke smiles and winks at me when I straighten. “Sounds great,” I say, although I need to be careful not to give Luke the wrong idea. He asked me out to dinner a while back, and I told him it was against school policy to date a parent, which wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the only reason. After everything that happened, I haven’t really been interested in anyone. Just keeping myself and Josh safe is my priority because I’m not sure if Lev or the men he works with have found out that I was there that night. That I have the flash drive they were looking for. That I know they killed Nina’s family.
But I’m not taking any chances. I can’t because it’s not just my life at stake now. I won’t let anything happen to my baby and that includes losing me. Because I know what happens when you’re alone in the world. I know the monsters that prey on those weaker than them, and I will not allow monsters into Josh’s life.
And besides, I’m not interested in Luke as anything more than a friend. Since Lev, I haven’t been interested in anyone.