Page 42 of Judging Julia

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Julia

She only made it a few steps from Derek’s office before stopping, her feet rooted to the floor. Just a couple feet away stood Hayleigh, looking just as sweet and happy as Julia remembered. It was easy to see now why Connor had fallen so hard, so fast. Tall, with curves for days, Hayleigh always had a smile for everyone, it seemed.

But when she turned and spotted Julia staring at her, that smile faded, along with some of the pink in her cheeks. The color came rushing back with a vengeance, and then some, her face flushing a bright red as fury flashed in her eyes.

“What are you doing here?”

Julia flinched at the venom in Hayleigh’s normally sweet voice. “I, um, came to speak with Derek. And Connor.”

Betrayal joined the anger in the other woman’s expression. “Nobody told me you were here. What’s going on? I swear to god, if you’re here to beg for your job back —”

“No, no, nothing like that. The complete opposite, actually.”

“Oh.” Mollified somewhat by the answer it seemed, Hayleigh tilted her head to the side, watching Julia with a guarded kind of curiosity. “Then why are you here? I thought you weren’t supposed to meet with them until tomorrow.”

“I was but…it’s complicated.” Glancing side to side, Julia took a step forward, tentatively closing the gap between them. “I came to apologize. For everything.”

Hayleigh rolled her eyes, the corner of her lip pulling up in a sneer. “Yeah, I know all about your supposed apology. So you can get Connor’s recommendation letter for that fancy job at The Majestic, right?”

“That was the agreement, yes.”

“Well, as far as I’m concerned, apology not accepted. You really think you can just waltz in here, after everything you did, and just say ‘sorry’ and we’re just supposed to act like nothing ever happened?”

“No, that’s not — no.” Who knew sweet little Hayleigh would be a harder nut to crack than the three, stern-faced Daddies she’d just faced off with? “I know what I did is beyond redemption. And I accept that. Just like I accept you may never be able to forgive me for what I did. But, for whatever little bit it might be worth, I am genuinely sorry.”

Wrapping her arms around her middle, Hayleigh stared at her like she was an alien species. “You’re only saying that so you can get the recommendation letter.”

“Originally, yes.” The truth was bitter on her tongue, but she forced herself to speak it anyway. “When I agreed to come and apologize in person, that was really my only reason. I didn’t care about making amends, and I honestly didn’t care if you were hurting. But that’s not why I’m here today.”

“What changed?”

“I did.”

The disbelief was written all over Hayleigh’s face, and Julia couldn’t blame her one bit. “You changed. How? Why?”

“I met someone.” She couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Owen and the weekend they’d shared. “Someone who held me responsible for all the awful things I did to you and to Connor and to everyone else.” Someone who taught me I was worthy of being loved, despite it all.

“I see.” Doubt still colored her tone, but there was a hint of something else. Sympathy, maybe? The kind shared by submissives who knew exactly how difficult and painful being forced to face your own mistakes truly was. “I just…I don’t understand why, Julia. What did I ever do to make you hate me that much?”

“It wasn’t you. If nothing else, I hope you believe me when I say that none of this was ever because of you.”

“Then why? It couldn’t possibly just have been because you liked Connor.”

“I didn’t just like Connor. I cared for him, deeply.” Hesitating, she considered her next words carefully. “I don’t want this to sound like I’m making excuses, because I’m not. But I haven’t had a whole lot of people in my life I could depend on. Growing up, it was just me and my mom, and when I lost her, I had no one left to care for me. Then I came to the Ranch and everyone welcomed me with open arms, especially Connor. And when you came along, and it was obvious how much he wanted you…”

“It felt like you were losing someone all over again,” Hayleigh finished quietly.

“Yeah. And then when he fired me, all I could think about was how I was losing him, and my home, all at once. It doesn’t excuse what I did, but I hope you can understand that it was never about you, not really. You didn’t do anything to deserve that from me.”

“I don’t know what to do with that.” Hayleigh hugged herself more tightly and Julia found herself wishing she’d waited until tomorrow after all, so they wouldn’t have to be facing all these turbulent emotions alone. “It seems like I should forgive you, but I honestly don’t know how.”

“I understand.” The sting of being rejected, again, was sharp and brutal, but that was her problem, her pain to deal with on her own. This moment was about Hayleigh.

“Is everything okay out here?”

Turning at the familiar, deep voice, Julia found all three men she’d walked out on standing behind her. Derek, who’d spoken, stood just in front of the small pack, a single eyebrow raised in question.


Tags: Stella Moore Romance