“Don’t, Hollie. You do everything for us. We wouldn’t make it…Iwouldn’t make it if it wasn’t for you. I’m still glad you’re here though.” She gives a humorless laugh and settles into the chair next to the bed.
I reach down and grab Mom’s hand. It’s so cold that if the heart monitor wasn’t steadily beeping away next to me, I would think she was dead. I hear a noise to my right and for the first time I notice that there’s a curtain separating Mom’s bed from another one. It’s a tight fit with all of us in here, and if the other occupant had anyone visiting them, we would positively spill out into the hallway. But when you’re poor, beggars can’t be choosers.
“Has the doctor been in yet?” I ask quietly, trying not to disturb our roommate.
“Just some nurses. They told me a few things, but honestly, I didn’t really understand what they were talking about. I know they gave her Naloxone and they think that she’s going to be okay, but they won’t tell me when she’ll wake up.”
Instead of waiting around for someone to stop by and explain what’s going on, I make my way to the nurses’ station to see what information I can get. I don’t know what we’re going to do. Even before I got fired, there was no way we could afford a hospital stay. Who knows how long they’ll want to keep her here? I put together a rough estimate in my head and the sum is staggering. The sad thing is that I’m probably still way below what it will actually end up costing.
The nurse at the desk assures me she’ll have the doctor come speak to us as soon as possible and I make my way back to the room. By the time I return, Paige is passed out in the chair next to the bed.
Poor kid probably didn’t get any sleep at all last night. Not that I did either. I was worried I might fall asleep on the four-hour drive here. Instead, I was in my own personal hell, sponsored by Toyota. Being trapped in a tiny car with nobody for company except my own thoughts is a circle of hell that I don’t remember Dante discussing.
If I wasn’t freaking out about Mom being in the hospital, then I couldn’t stop seeing the expression on Archer’s face when he fired me. His eyes were so cold it was as if he had never seen me before. I’m still hurt. Devastated, really. But I’m also pissed. We could have been great together, but he wouldn’t listen to a simple explanation. He wouldn’t give me five minutes of his time after everything we’d been through. It was like he was just looking for an excuse to get rid of me. He took a knife and swiftly carved me out of his life, both personally and professionally.
It’s another hour before a severe looking older man in scrubs and a white coat enters the room. The doctor appears to be in his sixties and his expression says that those years weren’t very enjoyable. When he finally spots me leaning against the wall across the room, I can feel the disapproval coming off of him in waves.
“You’re Mrs. Simmons’s next of kin?”
“It’s Miss and yes, I’m her daughter, Hollie. It’s nice to meet you. What can you tell me about my mom?”
“She is extremely lucky.” The look in his eyes says he isn’t necessarily happy about it. I bristle and pull away from the wall. “It appears to have started with a heroin overdose,” he rifles through the notes on his clipboard, “but that triggered a minor heart attack. Then there is the fact that she was dumped out of a moving car, so she has several bruises and abrasions, but nothing’s broken.” My entire body stiffens. No one had said anything about a heart attack. This is worse than I thought, much worse.
“Do you know when she’ll wake up or when we’ll be able to take her out of here?”
“When she can leave? That will depend entirely upon when she wakes up, which could happen any time. She’ll probably only need to remain another twenty-four hours for observation after that.”
I let out a sigh of relief. If she wakes up soon, that will only be two days in the hospital. There’s still no way in hell that I can afford it, but it’s a lot better than a week.
“Listen,” he says, “we’ll get her on her feet and out of here, but if something doesn’t change, she’s going to be right back in this bed or worse. She needs to get into a detox and rehab program if you want to have any chance of turning this around.”
I want to fault him for delivering that kind of news so callously, but it was the cold, hard truth. Every word. I’ve known for a long time that at any moment she could be gone forever, but what could I do?
“Do you have any information on those programs? Something provided by the state maybe?” I ask hopefully.
I can see his gaze soften the tiniest bit. Maybe he can feel a little bit of sympathy after all.
“If you go downstairs, there are case managers that should be able to help with that. But to be honest with you, there is a waiting list a mile long for those facilities. If you combine her cardiac issues with the drug use, I don’t know how long she has to wait.”
My hands are shaking when the doctor leaves us. I’m at a complete loss. I always have a plan, a solution, but right now… I just want to lie down and cry. I can feel the full weight of the world on my shoulders and I have what’s possibly the most insane thought that’s ever been thought.
I wish Archer was here.
Well, I’ve finally cracked under the pressure. I don’t know if it’s my brain or my heart thinking such traitorous thoughts, but either way, they’re wrong. I don’t wish he was here. If I ever thought I could count on him for anything, he proved me wrong last night. I’m disposable, like every other woman is to every other man of his social standing. I should have listened to my mother.
Now IknowI’ve lost it.
Paige has her bright eyes locked on me and I can tell she’s waiting for my plan. How I’m going to fix this. So I say the only thing that I can. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of everything.” She doesn’t look like she believes me and frankly, I don’t believe me either.
I collapse into the chair next to her and take her hand in my own, giving it a squeeze to tell her I love her.
“I’m going to move back to Milford.”
“What?!”
I shush her before the person on the other side of the thin curtain complains. “Look Paige, if Mom is going to go to rehab then you have to stay with someone. I know you don’t want to leave your friends and school and have to start over in Seattle. Plus, if I’m here, then I can help with Mom when she comes home. It makes the most sense.”
“But what about your friends and your job?”