What the actual fuck.
The beautiful blonde walks in wearing a snarky smirk on her bright pink lips. I stand, crossing my arms across my chest, instantly on edge and on high alert. What in the ever-loving fuck could she possibly want from me?
“What are you doing here, Karina?” She holds her hands up, keeping her distance.
Smart.
“I’m here to apologize for my behavior that night at dinner.”
“You’ve already apologized. Coming here wasn’t necessary.”
“Yes, it is. I owe you an apology face-to-face. Please, just a moment of your time.” I know I’ll regret this and should say no, but instead of doing that, I let my arms fall to my sides and wave toward the empty seats in front of my desk, welcoming her to take a seat as I reclaim my own.
With a smile, she walks toward the chairs, pulls one out, and takes a seat, crossing her long slender legs. Her button nose scrunches up when she sits. “I like the perfume you’re wearing. What is it?”
My eyebrows pull together in confusion, taken aback by her random interest in my perfume. “It’s custom, a gift I got a while back from Declan.” A ghost of a smile tugs at my lips at the memory. I’d been complaining because I had dropped my favorite perfume bottle and broke it, and since it had been discontinued, there was no way to buy another bottle. A week later, Declan surprised me with a new bottle of perfume that he’d customized himself. He chose the perfect scents that he said reminded him of me, and I’ve been wearing it every day ever since.
“Well, it must not be too custom because Dean’s assistant has the same one. Maybe Declan just told you it was special,” she says smugly, raising her eyebrow in challenge.
Her words are unexpected, but I keep a straight face, not wanting to show her that it affects me. Marjorie doesn’t wear the same perfume as I do, and I know that for a fact for two reasons.
One, Declan created the perfume. You can’t buy it anywhere. And two, Marjorie once complimented me on it and asked where she could buy it for her daughter. I’d told her the same thing I just told Karina; it’s a unique creation. You can’t purchase it.
Which means only one thing. If she smelled it on Dean, then it’s from me. I don’t know if he’s told her about our affair, though I’m assuming he hasn’t, or I’m sure she’d be here clawing my eyes out instead.
Clearing my throat, I sit up straighter in my chair. “Thanks for stopping by, but I have a lot of work to do.”
“Understood, I won’t take long. Again, I only wanted to apologize for my behavior and what I said. That was completely unacceptable. And as a mother myself, I should’ve known better.” Her lips stretch into a wide smile, her hand spreading out over her flat stomach. “Your advice to pause and stop stressing really seemed to work.Myhusband and I are having a baby.” The way she emphasizesmydoesn’t go unnoticed.
With a challenging look, Karina turns her phone toward me, showing me the gray and black ultrasound photo.
My heart stops beating and falls into my stomach. I feel the color drain from my face as a chill shoots down my spine and goosebumps spread across my flesh.
Karina’s pregnant.
She’s having Dean’s baby.
He’s been ignoring me because his wife is pregnant with their child.
I don’t think I’m even breathing as I stare at the photo for so long, my vision becomes blurry, and my ears begin ringing.
“I hope you’re enjoying working with Anthony. It’s been so nice to have Dean home for a change and not have him distracted. He’s been having so many late-night meetings. Good thing that’ll no longer happen.” The implication is evident in her tone.
Clearing my throat, I ask, "How long have you known? About the baby?" My stomach is rolling, and I'm more nauseous than ever. I say a silent prayer hoping that Dean recently found out about it and wasn't aware during our time together. My heart beats wildly in my chest, my hands shake in my lap, and I slowly wipe my sweaty palms on my legs.
"For about a month. I told him as soon as the test returned positive." She smiles, and I'm unable to tell if she's lying.
Karina stands, shoving her phone into the back pocket of her jeans. “Have a nice day, Camille. Tell Declan I said hello.” Without another word, she exits my office. The slamming door behind her snaps me out of my stupor.
Karina knows, and I shouldn’t be surprised. Dean and I haven’t exactly been the most discreet.
I remain seated, unable to trust myself to stand when my entire body feels numb. I’m too in shock to move or form a single thought. I can only remain seated in my chair and stare blankly out at the city.
Even as it gets dark, I remain in the same position.
* * *
Somehow,I manage to get myself home after work. I don’t remember how, but I was able to drive and stop at the liquor store on the way. I have no recollection, but the empty liquor bottles on my nightstand are all the proof I need, that and the fact I spent several hours hugging the toilet, puking my guts out. I dragged myself from the cold tile of my bathroom floor and put myself to bed, and I’ve been here since. Unable to move, unable to do much of anything besides stay buried in my blanket burrito and alternate between sleeping, feeling sorry for myself, and being angry at myself.