“Me. Seriously, Evie. You are so hard on yourself. You don’t think most people have felt jealous before, some not even as self-aware as you to know they’re doing it? You think I want to be jealous of my own brother and his achievements? Of course not. As soon as the thought pops into my mind, I have to tamp it down. But there it is. Because I’m human. And fallible.”
“You aren’t really jealous of Enzo, though. You want him to be successful. You just want your dad to be proud of you too, which I know he is.”
“Ok, Freud. Couldn’t we say the same for you? That you aren’t really jealous of me? That you want me to be successful too? But that you just want to do your parents’ legacy justice, which, I will add, you already have. In spades.”
The fact that I didn’t see him turning the tables on me shows how out of it my mind has been lately.
“It’s an awkward situation, the damn award. And there will be more awkward situations. Some you’ll come out ahead, and others I will. In the end, we’ll both be fine. Better than fine. Do you know how I’m so sure of that?”
“How?” I ask, wanting to believe him.
“Because Bridgewater is big enough for us both. We’ve already proven that.”
He’s not wrong.
“You want more. And I do too. But our goals are not mutually exclusive. I’ve been thinking a lot about this. Really, when you get down to it, we want different things. Me, to expand. You, to make Leoni’s a culinary treasure. We can help each other, Evie.”
Why do my worries seem to melt away with him near? Every time. And then, when I’m alone, waking up in the middle of the night, they’re so much bigger. And scarier.
“I talked to Zara after you,” I admit.
“And what did she say?”
“She said . . .” I look out the window just in time to realize where Tris is heading. We’re going to the Jersey Shore. “She said we can’t break up.”
Tris winces. “What made her think that might happen?”
I almost wish I stayed staring out the window when I see his expression. “It felt like that’s where things were headed. We hardly talked all week. And then this weekend.” I shrug. “I don’t know.”
He looks quickly at me and then back at the road.
“Let me make this simple, Evie.” His voice has an air of command about it. The kind he might use in boss mode. “I do know. And Zara’s right. We can’t break up. We won’t break up.”
Another quick glance.
“No?”
His hand squeezes mine.
“No. It’s that simple. Just no. Not gonna happen.”
I can’t help but laugh.
“And if I say I want to break up?” I venture, not really wanting that, but just feeling so completely and utterly unsure about us. Can we really make this work?
“I will say no. And then we’ll carry on, like before. Easy.”
I do laugh now. “You’ll say no?”
“I will.”
“Is that even an option? Like if someone wants to break up, just saying no?”
He smiles. “I’d prefer not to try. But if you insist, give it a shot. We’ll see what happens.”
“You’re out of your mind.”
“For you? Yes, I am.” His voice takes on a serious tone. “I’m not going anywhere, Evie. This may have started as a ruse, but that didn’t last long. It’s pretty clear to me we wanted an excuse to be together even when the situation seemed impossible.”