“You know I love you, but you stink. Get a shower,” she muffled against my shoulder, and we both giggle. Then she looks hopefully at me with pouted lips. "So, the bar?”
“Not happening,” I tell her flatly, ignoring her face. “Now you can get out of my room so I can get my morning ablutions out of the way and visit the grocery store?”
“And don’t forget to shower, bitch,” she mutters beneath her breath as she makes her way to the door.
“Dude, I heard that!”
CHAPTER26
BETH
I have decided to take a walk through campus today and buy the required textbooks for most of the courses I'll be taking on. It's a good distraction from the constant thoughts of Mitch.
Erika, who has been trying to get me to go to a bar with her, has refused to join me. She says she'd rather soak herself in alcohol than a textbook.
So, striding across the carpeted grass, with a ton of books in hand, I feel oddly good, and I can't believe that I have forgotten the insurmountable comfort books had always given me. I smile at the pile in my arms, knowing it will provide a good distraction from the recent obsessive thoughts I've been having. The campus is alive with students milling around, most of whom I can tell from the exaggerated outfits are pretty much first years.
When my eyes lock on Smith's, I nearly drop the pile of books in my arms from shock. Right in front of me, like a bad dream come to life, he stands with an awkward smile on his face. I stop, feeling rooted to the ground until he approaches me.
“Hey, Beth.”
I let my gaze sweep over his body, taking in the snugly fitted button-up and snug jeans, as well as the curly mop of blond hair that always gave him an innocent look when it fell across his eyes, as it did now.
“Hello Smith,” is all I manage because I do not think I want to stand here and share light-hearted conversations with someone who's broken my heart to pieces.
“It's good to see you,” he says, his eyes running over my form, a glint appearing in those eyes I had, until several months ago, always gotten lost in. I don't know how I feel about seeing him. We had not exactly ended on good terms, so, I don't return the niceties. It’s an awkward moment where neither knows what to say, until Smith ventures again.
“I tried to reach out,” he explains.
I shake my head at his words.
“How many times?”
He at least has the decency to look away as he replies.
“After I said those mean things to you, I tried to contact you.”
“You tried all of four times, Smith,” I say, but without hurt because, as I gaze at him, I know that he no longer has that hold over me like he used to. My heart does not thud nor does my pulse hammer like it always did in his presence. It is as if that spell that had made him really special is not just there anymore.
“We can maybe, go for a drink sometime?”
“No, Mitch,” I boldly tell him as I hold his gaze. “We are over and I don't think I would like for us to pick up right where we left off.”
“Why?” he questions with a slight frown.
“Other than the fact that I caught you cheating? Or the fact that your favorite pastime became Bashing Beth? I just don’t think we are a good fit. You and I aren't compatible, Smith. There's no guarantee that history wouldn’t repeat itself.”
Smith nods, looking crestfallen.
“I'm sorry for how horribly I treated you. I'm seeing a therapist now and I'm getting to understand that there's so much I need to unpack. It was never you; it was always me.”
Even though Smith's words should make me feel happy and smug, I find that all I feel for him is sympathy and hope that he knows to treat the next woman in his life right.
“I do hope,” he continues, “that we stay friends, at least.”
As he gazes at me with so much vulnerability and hope in his eyes, I find myself stepping into his personal space and hugging him. However awkward, with the books between us, I find that it sort of heals something inside of me, and as I breathe in the familiar scent of his cologne, I know that I am well and truly over him.
“I wouldn't do that if I were you,” someone says behind me, startling me out of Smith's arms.