The moment is serene. I should go back to my office so Jefferson can tell her the secret, now that he’s had her in what may be his last time.
I honestly don’t know what she’ll say. He’d asked her last night if she wanted kids but detoured the conversation before she could ask him the same. Will her desire for children include a ten-year-old result of a broken condom?
My brother’s head rests on the other side of hers, and she stares at me with half-lidded, sex-drunk eyes. He doesn’t know I’m here. His intimate words are meant for her alone. “Thank you for convincing me to tell you before we did this. I love you, Baby Doll. We can be a happy family.”
Her eyes fall shut. “I want that.”
She already knows? He’s always been the charmer. Always the one to take a risk and win. Did he plan it this way?
Competition and jealousy edge their way back to the surface. Am I a fool to think them letting me join them last night was anything more than a little fun while they’re trapped in my house?
Fire burns through me. My hunger for Natalie is the problem. My involvement could cost Jefferson his son and Natalie her job.
Every dream about my angel goes up in smoke. The easy answer…the one that lets me protect my pride in the face of potential rejection…let her go…before they let me go.
My erection’s long gone by the time they whisper a few more things I can’t make out. I turn toward my office.
“Wait.” Angel…Natalie’s request is tempting, but I have to get my heart out of this.
I wave a hand over my shoulder. “I said I wouldn’t interfere. I’ve gotta get back to work. We can fuck later.”
Fourteen
Natalie
Therearesomanylevels of uncharted territory, it’s a relief to work the rest of the day. I think we all welcomed the chance to step back. Lincoln seemed to need space. Huge changes hang in limbo. Plus, my newly, non-virgin parts needed a little break. They got quite a workout.
When I’m on hold during a phone call, I browse the kitchen and set ingredients out for dinner. We’d snacked for lunch so this is the first meal I get to prepare. It gives me a cozy, useful, homey feel.
Lincoln hangs up from a call as he enters the kitchen and starts talking to me. He doesn’t realize Muzak plays in my wireless earbuds. I disconnect my call.
“The road crews anticipate getting one lane open by tomorrow morning, and I’ve asked them to send a tow truck for my car. I’ll have Jefferson drop me off at work. You can take the morning off to run home and get fresh clothes, and whatever you need to do. Or just take the whole day off.”
Discomfort intertwines itself with my day.
“Thank you, but since I’ll be heading into town to get home, I could drop you off.”
“Jefferson owes me. It’s fine.”
“Okay.” I motion to the items I’ve set out. “I’ll have dinner ready at seven this evening.”
“Thank you.” His stilted answer and the distance he keeps between us intensify the change in demeanor I’d detected after he watched Jefferson and me have sex. My hands shake as I ask, “Are we okay?”
“Of course. You haven’t done anything wrong.”
“It just seemed like earlier, when you saw Jefferson and me, you didn’t like that.”
He shrugs, “Because I had to get back to work and couldn’t fuck you right then? Or because you and Jefferson are turning sex lessons into discussions about kids?”
The sting pinpoints the problem. The solution remains elusive. Forcing the issue could bring heartache, but we have to talk.
I gently say, “It just happened. We didn’t mean to—”
“Don’t explain. I’ve never seen him happier. Having a woman by his side will help him look all the more stable while he tries to win back custody of his son. You can have a happy, instant family with him. I just hope you don’t plan on quitting. It’s hard to find a good admin.”
He waves a couple of fingers as he turns and leaves.
I’m too stunned to form a question, and the one I need to ask is better suited for Jefferson. He said he came back to be closer to his kid, not that he had to win custody.