I watch him disappear out the door. He knows something. A piece of the puzzle he isn’t ready to share. I don’t know him well enough to know if he will ever share. Maybe one day, but for now, he’s hiding it.
“Yeah, well, I have to get packing,” Devon clears his throat. “Gracie and I are moving into my dad’s home over the next couple of weeks.”
“Yeah, Gracie told us about that,” Heidi says a little weakly. “Do you need help?”
“I’ll be helping,” I pipe up and move towards the door.
“We’ll let you know if anything else comes up. Love you guys,” Devon gets up and crosses to Heidi, pecking her cheek before patting Reuban on the shoulder.
As I turn to open the door, Heidi’s next words make me hesitate.
“We just want Gracie to be happy, safe. We don’t care about what her heart wants as long as it makes her happy.”
Envy boils momentarily in me, and I shove it down, leaving the house without even looking back. My parents would never accept that. If they get wind that I’m even considering a relationship with a man and a woman, they will freak out. But knowing that alone makes me want to be part of this much more.
I look around when I step off the porch, but Gracie’s already gone, and so is Owen’s car, leaving my bike free to pull out.
Chapter47
Gracie
I’m still fuming as I enter the little store. I don’t exactly know why I’ve come here, but my feet carried me here. My mind is running, spinning. I can’t settle on one single thought now. I need something to douse the anger, to make it go away. I want the hurt to go away. I know I’ve done wrong in the past. But why can no one see how hard I’m trying? They see the past and nothing else.
I know Tris was right. I must keep proving myself for everyone to really see the change, but I would’ve thought just one person could’ve believed me. Even Devon and Owen are having difficulty doing so. At least I’ve got Colton. Then again, he wasn’t exactly around when the fire was burning. He came at a good time, when the embers were lit but not flaming. He’s lucky that way. He doesn’t know the worst; therefore, he can’t judge me.
I stop at the counter, lingering to the side as some guy pays his bill. My eyes remain on the cigarettes, half tempted to buy some just to ease the pain inside. Maybe I’ll take up chewing, but that just sounds gross. My eyes don’t stop until they drop to the roll of lotto tickets. My fingers twitch. There are so many. So many possibilities to win. I’ve been lucky on them before, and it’s been so long since I’ve done any.
My eyes flicker to the store door, but nobody I know is even dawdling outside. I have free reign. No one can stop me. Strangers don't know my story, don't know that sometimes, I get a little carried away. I don’t have to get carried away, though. I can stop at any time. I stopped drugs and alcohol. It took a bit of time, but I did. I don’t have a gambling problem. Just because I lost some money and had to borrow it from my niece, resulting in my father having to pay her back, doesn’t mean shit. That was by accident. Besides, I’ve worked that off with daddy as it is.
“What can I get for you?” the burly man behind the counter asks, his voice slightly gruff.
I glance around to see the rest of the store empty and him talking to me, still standing by the side of the counter obviously waiting for my turn. I take a step up to the front and point at the tickets. “The two-dollar ones,” I tell him, biting my lip. “Five of them.”
Two-dollar tickets aren’t bad. Ten dollars altogether won’t kill me. It won’t even break me, for now. Besides, if I don’t win, I won’t buy anymore. It’s that simple. It has to be that simple. He hands me the tickets, and I give him the money to purchase them, leaving the little corner store. I look around again, and once more, I don’t see anyone I know. I barely even recognize where I am. A group lingers on a stoop across the street with their backs turned to me. They’re laughing, though, and it drifts over me. I can detect the distant scent of booze and know that they’re all drinking in broad daylight.
They remind me of the people I used to hang out with. No matter what time of the day, we drank or got high. I got high more than drinking, but it really didn’t matter what hour of the day or night it was. When I needed a fix, I got it. Shrill catcalls enter my ears, and I spot a couple of the guys looking right at me.
I step back and turn to walk away, shoving the lotto tickets in my pockets. Pounding feet enter my ears before two guys appear on both sides of me. I turn and head back to the store, needing to get somewhere others are. Even if it is just one person. Daddy taught me a long time ago when you’re uncomfortable in someone’s presence, get to a place that has security in some form. A grocery store has cameras. If these guys try anything, at least there will be evidence.
Hands grab at me before I can return to the store, pulling me back, shoving me against the wall. Rancid breath stinking of booze clouds over my face and stings my nostrils. I like the scent; it reminds me of my other life. A life I sometimes dream about and want to go back to but know that I can’t. Simply because it isn’t a good life. I know that I see that.
One of them presses his face in front of mine. He has a little hoop looped around his eyebrow and one that hangs on the corner of his lip. I cringe inwardly at the sight. I don’t understand people who do facial piercings. That’s never been my thing, but whatever pleases them.
“You’re a pretty little thing, aren’t you?” he breathes.
I pull my head as far back as possible, pressing against the brick wall behind me. His fingers grip my arms tighter, making the feeling in them go almost numb. I can’t move even if I want to. My eyes sweep down his body and catch sight of the gun beneath his coat. I suck in a breath and raise my eyes back to him.
“What do you want?” I ask.
He grins, yellows teeth with a few black spaces of some missing show back at me. “I know who you are. My… friend has been looking for you, Gracelyn.”
I grimace. “What friend?”
“George,” he says bluntly.
My heart sinks at the name. It's only one name, a first name, but it’s all I need.
I shake my head vigorously. “What does he want?”