Taking his seat again, he holds out the box, and I reach out, taking it from him for the second time in my life. I pop it open and stare down at my mother’s ring, my heart skipping a beat at the sight.
“This is mom’s ring,” I say, even though he obviously knows that.
“Gerald’s grandson found it on eBay and recognized it.”
I can only stare at it. It’s a blue sapphire, picked special for my mom.
“I know how it got it there. Gerald’s grandson explained it to me,” my dad said gently.
I raise my eyes back to him again. I intentionally hadn’t told him about Gracie selling the ring. I didn’t want him to be angry with her. She sold it because of her addiction. She hadn’t been able to control it. I didn’t want dad to hate her because of that.
“I’m glad she’s better,” he says and spears more lasagna, shoving it into his mouth.
I set the ring next to my plate, take up my fork, and eat again. We chew in silence for a few minutes. The only sounds are that of clinking silverware and the swallowing of our tea.
“So, there’s something else we need to talk about,” he starts, and I swear my heart flops at that. “You need to get out of that apartment. Somewhere more… stable. When you and Gracie have kids, you’re going to need a yard and a place they can be loud and—”
“Dad!” I stop him. “Kids? Seriously? I don’t even know if Gracie and I are back together. We’re at this – this weird place in our relationship right now.”
He doesn’t even flinch with his question. “Have you two had makeup sex?”
I shift uncomfortably. Talking about having sex with my friends is one thing, but my dad? It's fucking weird.
He chuckles. “Sounds to me like you two are back together. As I was saying, you’re going to need a more stable place. I know that moving out of the apartment isn’t going to be easy. Especially since Gracie’s father is holding it up right now, but that gives me the perfect excuse to move into an assisted facility home.” He holds up a hand when I open my mouth to retort. “Please, son, don’t argue with me. I want to do this. I need to do this. I can’t live in this big old house by myself anymore, and I don’t expect you to move in just to give an old man company. But your mother and I bought this house, and I would hate for it to go back on the market when it can be given to a family member.”
I drop my fork and stare at him. I don’t know how to respond to any of that. I don’t want him to move out, but the idea of having a home for me and Gracie is thrilling. A place where we can start a family if she wants one as I do. A place big enough for everything we would want in life.
“We can still have weekly dinners. Whatever you would like,” he continues and smiles. “Plus, I won’t up and disappear with grandchildren coming.”
I roll my eyes. “I don’t even know if Gracie wants kids right now, dad. I have to figure out our relationship before we get into the kids thing.”
He shrugs. “That girl’s crazy about you. I’m sure there will be children eventually.”
I can see it in my mind’s eye. Two girls with Gracie’s hair and eyes and a little boy resembling me. A happy life. Except, there’s more within the life. Owen with his arm around her shoulders and the motorcycle guy lingering nearby. All of us with her, sharing her. And Gracie is so fucking happy.
I still don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about possibly sharing Gracie. I’m open to whatever it takes to make her happy. But at the same time, I don’t know how it would work. How would we each get to be without fighting over her time? How would we not lose our minds seeing her with other men?
“Are you… absolutely sure, dad?” I ask slowly, trying to piece everything together in my mind.
I don’t like feeling out of control. When I don’t understand something, I strive to get all the answers. I’ve always known exactly how to do that. Study and highlight the passages that’ll be on the test. Write the notes, and make notecards. Ask the questions and demand the answers. It is how you learn.
I don’t know what to do now. There is no textbook to study for this. I don’t know the questions to ask. I don’t like it, and I need Gracie to tell me what the fuck is going on so I can have somewhere to start, something to figure out.
“I am son, really,” he assures me.
We fall back to eating in silence again, but my head is everywhere but the dinner. Gracie makes me question everything; she always has. She’s a wild girl. But one that makes me want to drop everything and follow her to the edge of the rainbow so we can jump right into the pot of gold at the end together.
“Dad,” I say slowly, deciding to throw caution to the wind. Some answers are better than nothing, I suppose.“What if she wants me, but more?”
The question doesn’t even seem to faze the old man. “You mean like both you and Owen?”
I shrug with a nod. “Maybe one more? I don’t know for sure, but the way she was talking the other night—”
“Let her decide. She’ll come to you when she’s ready. Look, I don’t fully understand all this new stuff you kids are into. Growing up, being gay wasn’t even tolerable, let alone all of this new stuff. Transgender, sexual orientation, and having more than one partner. I’m not going to pretend I understand any of it, okay? I’m not against any of it, though, I promise. And I do want you and Gracie to be happy. In order to do that, you two must communicate one another’s needs. No matter what it is. You don’t have to be ashamed of what you want, and you better not make her feel ashamed for what she wants. That isn’t the son I raised.”
I nod again. “I know dad, and I would never make her feel bad about herself. I never have.”
It’s the honest truth. Because in my heart, Gracie has always deserved the best, the world, and everything her heart desires. So, if that means she wants three men, I will have to learn. I can share, but I’ll have to learn to live with them being with her too.