“Renata,” Kian says softly at my back.
I head straight to the boat’s railings and grip the edge as I heave my guts over into the green-blue waters. I stare down at the ripples the wind is making until I feel a little better.
When I finally straighten up, wiping the stringy spit from my lips, Kian is right there by my side. “Are you okay?”
“Okay?” I repeat furiously. “After what you just told me, how could I be?”
He frowns. “I explained to you why I planned it. And why I changed my mind.”
“Why you changed your mind is immaterial,” I say dismissively. “You wanted to hurt me, guilt me… blame me.”
“I wanted you to see reality,” he corrects. “You needed to understand—”
“Bullshit! This wasn’t about me understanding anything,” I snap. “This was another way for you to control and manipulate me. You just wanted to see me suffer.”
His expression hardens, but that only infuriates me further. Had he really expected me to understand? To empathize?
“No, no, no. Cut that shit out. You don’t get to be mad right now,” I say, jabbing his chest with my finger.
“Don’t I?”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Kian’s eyes spark dangerously. “Your brother can sell you to a monster. Beat you repeatedly. He can set the fucking world on fire and you’ll make excuses for him. But when it comes to anyone else—”
“Don’t try and twist this around,” I snarl at him. “It’s completely different.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s my brother, goddammit! My flesh and blood! And you’re just a power-hungry control freak who killed my father and stole me because you liked seeing me hurt.”
“Stole you?” he hisses.
I know I’m pushing the wrong button. But at this moment, I’m not interesting in de-escalation. I want a fight.
“Yes,” I say, refusing to back down. “You stole me. Just like you stole my childhood, my father, and any sense of security I might have ever had.”
He takes a step forward. “It was twenty fucking years ago,” he growls in my face. “And your father is the one who started a war he couldn’t win. I was defending my territory and my men. A don who can’t protect his people is no fucking don at all. You need to let this go. I’m not going to apologize for shit I can’t change. For shit I did before you.”
“I—”
“No,” he interrupts, “shut up and listen. You’re going to have to make a choice. You can forgive me for killing your parents. Or, if you can’t, then you’re free to go. You’re not my prisoner, remember? I showed you the door. You walked through it. These last few days, you’ve been here because you wanted to be.”
It feels like a slap in the face, but I keep my expression controlled. “I’ve been here for my brother.”
“Is that right?” he asks. “Were you thinking of your brother when you were fucking me?”
At that, I slap him.
I never actually make the decision to do it. It just happens on instinct, spurred by the anger coursing up my hand. And for a change, he doesn’t block it. Just a sharp, crisp SMACK as my palm connects with his bearded jaw.
Kian’s face barely moves under the blow. He just stares at me with his piercing blue eyes as if it never happened. As if his cheek isn’t reddening with every passing second.
“Truth hurts, doesn’t it, babe?” he asks without a shred of remorse. “But you can’t have it both ways. You can’t fuck me and hate me for depriving you of your parents at the same time.”
I frown, his words piercing through my current veil of anger. “Parents?” I echo. “What are you talking about…? My mother was never in the picture.”
He gives me an odd expression. I feel cold all of a sudden. “What aren’t you telling me?”