But when she returns, she’s got backup. Two big, brawny male nurses in scrubs so tight they look like they’re about to burst.
“No!” Pa roars, eyes bulging. “I don’t want those fucking pills. Saoirse, call Tristan!”
I give his arm a final squeeze and step back from the bed to give the nurses more room.
“No, get away from me with your devil pills!” Pa is yelling as I turn my back on him to stare out the corridor window. “No! No! No…!”
The sounds of scuffling.
Velcro straps.
Beeps growing louder and louder and then—
It all fades away.
The nurses file back out a few minutes later. It’s quiet again. I can’t bear to lift my head up.
“Miss?”
I glance up to see the blond nurse gazing at me with pity. The cheerful smile is back on her face.
“He’s going to be out for a while,” she informs me kindly. “You should go home. Get some rest yourself.”
“If he wakes up in the night, he’ll want me.”
“We’ll take care of him,” she assures me.
I sigh. “He’s not gonna believe that.”
“Well, tough,” she says. Her smile never wavers. “You’re still just a kid. You’re never gonna have a life of your own if you’re constantly trying to save his.”
I stare at her, trying to process those words.
She puts her hand on my shoulder. “Go home, girl,” she says softly. “If he needs you, we’ll call.”
Then she leaves.
I slink back in. Pa is asleep, the drugs having taken quick hold over him. All the worry lines on his face are smoothed out as he rests.
I touch his hand, then sigh and slump into the chair at his bedside.
God only knows how much debt is waiting for me in a little desk drawer at home.
God only knows how we’re going to get through it all.
“Mama,” I whisper into my hands, “I wish you were here.”
My cell phone vibrates in my pocket. I don’t even bother checking. I know who it is.
Tristan has been texting me constantly the last few days. He hasn’t actually paid Pa a visit—not since he’d woken up, anyway.
But he is a constant presence. The shadow looming over my shoulder.
I can feel him everywhere.
“Jesus,” says a voice from the doorway. “If they want people to get better, they shouldn’t make the rooms so depressing.”
I gasp, bolt upright, whirl around one hundred and eighty degrees.