The cloak of safety and comfort that engulfed me an hour ago is gone.
Last night, things were blurred and soft and beautiful under the fairy lights.
But there’s no romance in the daylight.
“Excuse me, miss?”
I nearly jump a foot.
The man looking down at me is dark-skinned, tall, and broad-shouldered. He’s wearing a suit and carrying a cup of coffee in his hand.
“Sorry,” he says quickly. “I didn’t mean to alarm you.”
“I, uh… It’s…”
I know I’m not making any sense. I’m barely coherent.
“Are you okay?” he asks with concern.
I shake my head, tears floating up to my eyes despite myself.
“No, I’m not okay. Nothing’s going to be okay anymore.”
“There now, it can’t be all that bad,” he consoles. “Did you have a fight with your parents? Or your boyfriend maybe?”
I want to laugh in his face.
How little he knows. How little he understands.
I wipe away my tears and stand up. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine,” I say.
Cillian would have accused me of lying. He’d be right, too.
But he’s not here.
He’s only been in my life for such a short period of time, and yet his absence feels colossal. There’s a void in my world that I can’t quite wrap my head around.
And why would that be the case—unless I didn’t believe I’d see him again?
“Are you sure?” the man asks, forcing me back to the present. “Do you need to use a phone?”
“No,” I say curtly. “But thank you.”
I start walking away before I dissolve into tears and make myself his problem. I turn the corner and blend into all the people heading off to their respective workplaces.
I want to go straight to the hospital, but I decide to stop by at my house first and clean myself up a bit.
A part of me is hoping that Cillian will be there waiting for me.
* * *
But when I arrive, the house is as silent as ever.
I head straight to the bathroom across the hall from my bedroom. I’m almost afraid to look at my reflection in the mirror.
But when I do, I’m surprised.
I expect to see myself scarred and broken.