“No. It’ll probably be another few months before he does. Besides, he’s still sulking over my refusal to leave ‘that psychopathic bastard.’”
“He’s a waste of skin, Harper, and a sad excuse for a parent.” The only reason Knox hadn’t beat the shit out of him was that Lucian did actually care for her in his own way. She was the only person he had an attachment to, in fact.
“He’s not so bad.”
“You deserve a better father than he could ever be.”
“Your parents let you down, but you still cared for them right up until the end, right?”
“Hmm.” His parents hadn’t been biologically related to him, since his kind were born from the flames of hell, but they had cared for him. Loved him, even. They’d also fell victim to the lies and manipulation of a demon cult-like leader and failed to protect Knox from him.
Eventually they’d stood up for him. And then the leader had slit their throats as punishment. At that point, Knox lost control of his demon for the first time in his life. And the demon avenged his parents in a very painful and final way.
“What were your parents like, if you don’t mind me asking?” asked Harper.
“Of course I don’t mind you asking. They were idealists. Not always grounded in reality. They didn’t like what they were. It wasn’t that they were ashamed of being archdemons; it was that they hadn’t liked living a life in which they had to hide what they were from their friends. My mother liked to cook, but she wasn’t very good at it. My father liked to build things. He was full of ideas, but he never finished any project that he started unless he was ordered to do so by the leader.”
Then they were very unlike Knox, thought Harper. He saw things through to the end. “I don’t think they purposely failed you, Knox. I don’t think they meant to hurt you.”
“Their intentions were good when they helped form the group.” For that reason, he could forgive them for their mistakes. But Lucian? His motivations were always selfish, and Knox would never make allowances for that.
“This may seem like a really dumb question,” began Harper, “but do you remember anything about being born from the flames?”
“No, I don’t. My earliest memories are of when I was a toddler.”
“Tell me a little about the children’s home you stayed at.” He’d only ever mentioned that in vague terms, so all she really knew was that it was where he met the sentinels.
“It wasn’t good. It wasn’t bad.” But at least he’d been safe there. “It was cold. Dull. There was no real color there. Everything was plain, including the food. The staff were strict, but they had to be in order to deal with a group of demon orphans. I liked the library. I spent most of my time there; absorbed every bit of knowledge I could find.”
“Is the place still standing?”
“Yes. It’s a hotel now.”
“You bought it,” she guessed.
“Someone needed to save it.”
Like it had saved him, Harper thought. The ice clinked against the glass as she sipped at her soda. “What drew you and the sentinels together?”
He thought about it for a moment. “Rage, maybe.”
She hadn’t expected that answer. “Rage?”
“All five of us carry it, each for our own reasons. Isla had it too.”
“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry that she put you in a position where you had to kill her – she was once your friend, so it had to have hurt on some level.”
Knox looked at his mate, amazed she could feel that way when the person in question had wanted her dead and, in temporarily stealing some of Harper’s power, made her vulnerable to the dark practitioners that had then kidnapped her. That night had been awful for her in more ways than one, but she could still speak Isla’s name without anger. “Come here.”
Harper slid off her lounger and straddled him. “What?”
He smoothed his hands up her back, breathing in the coconut scent of her sunscreen. “It’s a very good thing that I was the first demon to ever possess you. Not just because I would have been tempted to hunt down and destroy the others, but because if another demon had had you, he wouldn’t have let you go. Then I’d have had to kill him to take you from him.”
Harper snorted, amused. “You wouldn’t have done any such thing.”
“As I once told you, I’d started to feel numb to everything. Then there was you. And it all changed. You surprise me. Defy me. Frustrate me. Amuse me. Tease me. Having someone do those things… it was like waking up after a long yet unfulfilling sleep. So, yes, I’d have done whatever it took to have you.”
“You’d have had me as your anchor,” she reminded him.
“That wouldn’t have been enough.” He slipped one bikini strap aside and kissed her shoulder. Her petal-soft skin was hot from the sun. “I was always sure I wouldn’t need an anchor. It wasn’t until our psyches connected that I realized that, for all my power, you’re truly the only thing that could stop me turning rogue.”
“Sometimes I think, given my personality, I’m also the most likely thing to drive you to the brink of insanity.”
Pulling back, he smiled. “It’s true that you can get to me in a way that no one else can.”
“That’s just what it means to love someone. They can hurt you worse than anyone, but they can also make you happier than another person ever could.”