“I love you too, Fiona,” he says. “And you know I would do anything to keep you safe.”
I lean back to meet his eyes, taking his jaw in my hands. “Ryker, all I want is foryouto be safe. Can you do that for me?”
His breath catches in his throat, and I think he’s going to say no…then he nods, resting his forehead against mine.
“Yes,” he says. “I can.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
KYE
I don’t know much about Elixir.
No, that’s not true; I know a lot about Elixir, I just don’t know the effects it’s going to have on me. I think it’s something like a miracle drug, and I wonder if it’ll have any psychotropic effects once we consume it.
People like it so much, I expect that it will.
We’re in the dining room, Nereus sitting across from me. I really want to close the space between us and kiss him hard on the mouth. He’s always so fucking tempting, just sitting there with those big green eyes of his and that easy smile on his mouth. But this is more important, and I’m trying not to only do things that feel good. So we’re having this conversation instead; which, incidentally, doesn’t feel good at all.
“Okay,” I say. “So tell me, exactly, what the Elixir will do.”
“I don’t really know,” Nereus says. “I’ve never drank it.”
“What?” I ask.
From behind him, Taln nods. Part of the reason I insisted that we have this conversation in public is simply a deterrent. I always find it hard to resist Nereus, but I don’t know if the rest of the crew really wants to see us fuck.
“I simply haven’t had any need,” he says. “And when I see what it has done to Lamia, I just…that scares me. I understand that Elixir is an important substance, I know the ceremony should only help, but for what it’s worth, I’m hesitant too.”
“You are?” I ask him.
“Not to marry her,” he says. “I can feel that in my bones, how much I want to do it. And the Elixir ceremony is tradition in my culture. But I’m rather nervous, mostly because there’s no way for us to know the effects it’ll have on our minds or bodies, and while I think it is a good thing, there’s no way to know beforehand.”
“What?” I ask again. I’m willing to do this–I know it’s the right thing to do–but the more they talk about it, the more worried I grow. Nereus doesn’t answer me. Taln sits down noisily behind him. I can hear the sound of tapping in the back somewhere, Gliss still working on restoring the ship to its previous condition.
I think Aramis and Sten are off sharing a drink, and suddenly, my mouth is dry. I wish I was there with them instead of doing this. But no, this is important, I’m going to see this through, despite my hammering heartbeat. “So, okay,” I say, taking a sip of my lukewarm tea. “Let’s say Taln does the ceremony. Would his leg heal?”
“No,” Nereus says. “It doesn’t work like that.”
“Correct,” Taln says. “But I might be able to do some things Prince Nereus can do that I wasn’t able to do before.”
“What, like fashion?”
The joke doesn’t land. “No, not like fashion,” Nereus replies, as if I had been sincere. “I would have to teach him that.”
“And I have no interest in restrictive Merati clothing.”
“You think that’s restrictive?” I ask, motioning toward Nereus’ flowy white robe. Taln opens his mouth to say something, but I shake my head. “Okay. So not fashion. So like, what?”
“Perhaps I would be able to heal a little faster when I’m in a body of water,” Taln says.
“Or I could have a bit more endurance when I’m in combat,” Nereus says. “Don’t expect the changes to be particularly visible. We’re all being linked, and the link between us will be strong but subtle. You might have to search for it. There’s one other thing…”
I wait for him to continue, tapping my fingers against the now empty metal mug.
“This will affect your lifespan,” he says. “Merati and Skoll live for thousands of years. I’m not certain of the Mlok’s lifespans, but I know that the human lifespan is exceptionally short. Your lifespan will extend considerably once the Elixir ceremony takes place.”
“But your lifespan won’t shorten?”