11
RAVEN
I don’t feellike going home for a thousand reasons.
I don’t feel like doing anything.
And for sure, I don’t feel like going back to his place. I spent most nights at his house in Long Island because I found it comfortable. More so than my place.
Even last night, I was there.
It didn’t even cross my mind that he’d be here tonight, and I’d sleep at his place in Long Island while he’d spend the night who knows where.
I don’t know where he is, and I'm thinking about calling him.
I don’t.
He already said he’d see me tomorrow.
The fact that he hasn’t given me additional information about tomorrow aggravates me enough to stop me from calling him.
So, no. I won’t spend the night at his place. And I won’t go home right now, either.
I have no idea what to do. It’s Friday night. The week before Christmas. Looking out the window and staring at the falling snow, I’m getting nostalgic again.
Giana and Shauna have made plans for tomorrow, and I intend to join them.
Maybe Francisco and Alejandro will fly in this weekend.
All I know is that Kai is gone, and his father is hopefully gone too.
I dig my phone out of my purse.
I’ve lived in New York for too long not to know that things slow down the week before Christmas.
With that being said, a lot of people shop this weekend. Last-minute Christmas gifts. Holiday decorations.
I suddenly feel bad for neglecting my place. I should’ve made it nice and cozy for myself.
No wonder I don’t want to go home. I have no food in the fridge, and the only decorations I have up are from the night Kai had wrapped the lights around the tree in front of my house.
I don’t have a Christmas tree. I didn’t think I needed one. I was convinced I’d spend most of my time at his place.
While that could still happen, I’m not waiting for him to come home while he is here in New York.
No, no. That won’t happen.
I’m not his wife. Or his partner.
It’s enough we fucked this afternoon before he vanished. One romantic moment at a time, please.
So, where do I go?
I glance at the view. It snows beautifully. Feathery flurries swaying in the wind.
I would love to be someplace nice. Watch all this from inside a cozy room.
My kitchen back home must be inhospitable. I haven’t cooked there in a while, and my place is pretty cold when I’m not there.