“The three of us. At least, slightly intimidated.”
“You have no idea how intimidating you can be,” I continue, smiling facetiously.
He laughs.
“Sure… Seriously, now… I thought you’d be inhibited, full of contradictions, and question yourself every step of the way. Go back and forth.”
He goes quiet.
“How am I then?”
He ponders.
“You definitely know what you want and go for it. And then you’re not afraid to feel for all of us.”
My chest tightens.
“Is it so obvious?”
“What do you think?”
“Hmm. So everybody knows?”
He laughs quietly.
“Yes.”
“Even Kai?”
“What makes you think he doesn’t know? Everything he’s done so far has been prompted by you and your crazy feelings.”
I get a bit emotional.
“I, uh… Maybe I should show some restraint,” I say with a hint of self-deprecating humor.
“Whatever you do, showing some restraint is the last thing you should consider. Being the way you are has taught us a lot about ourselves.”
“Like what?”
“I can’t talk on behalf of the other two men, but in my case, I learned how good it feels to be with a woman. Really be with her when she’s into you.”
I don’t think he expects an answer from me, but even if he does, I don’t know what to say to him.
I never thought I’d have chemistry with three men at the same time. Not only when we share a bed but also in private with each other.
“Maybe things are easier when there’s competition…” I say.
“Yeah, maybe…” he murmurs. “The sexual drive is fantastic because there’s that window of opportunity when you can live an amazing experience, and people like to use it. It makes everything so delicious. I don’t know if that defines the chemistry between us, but I think we would’ve fucked the same, whether Kai had brought you to me that evening or I had picked you up in a bar.”
Staring at him, I crack a smile.
“What is it?” he asks.
“I try to imagine you picking me up at a bar.”
I bite my lip.
“It kind of makes me hot,” I say.