“Listen—”
“I wasn’t saying that to hurt you, Katie. It's just… I liked the way it sounded.”
“Mommy—”
“Jake, I—”
“Go see to our son. What if I wait for you and we talk after? I promise I’m not here to fight. Believe it or not, I don’t want Lennon to hear that either.”
She studies me for a second and then steps back to allow me to come inside. I walk in, wondering what in the hell I’m doing. Yet, I already know why I’m doing this.
I’m going on instinct and trying to listen to the pain in my mother’s voice. We’re all to blame—all of us.
All except Lennon.
I can’t get seven years back, but Katie and my family aren’t solely the reason I lost out on those years. No, that guilt rests on my shoulders too. I’m hurting, but I realize the pain and hurt I dealt Katie all those years ago must have been worse—even if I wasn’t aware of it.
“Have a seat. I can’t promise this won't take a while. Lennon hates going to sleep, and I usually give him his vitamins and melatonin before now.”
“Melatonin?” I question, instantly worried about my son.
My. Son.
Fuck.
“It’s all natural. It just helps him to relax a little. He gets sleepy. He just fights it like hell,” she explains, and I find myself grinning.
“That sounds like you. You used to be wide awake at two in the morning. I swear, I think you used to drink caffeine just so you wouldn’t get tired. You were such a night owl.”
“Yeah, well, not anymore. These days, I’m asleep the minute my head hits the pillow. I’ll be back. There’s water in the fridge. Jeff might have left some beers in there, not sure. If he did, they’re in the back of the bottom drawer.”
I watch her walk away and realize that despite the anger still inside me, this is the first time I’ve been comfortable with Katie in a long time—or at least I was until she mentioned my fucking brother.
I may agree to shoulder my part of the blame and I’m even willing to work through my anger with Katie and my mom.
But Jeff?
That bastard can rot in hell. The way I feel about him right now, I’d be willing to send him there myself.
The hate that I feel toward him isn’t something I’m going to be able to work through.
That relationship is gone.
And I don’t even give a fuck.
CHAPTER 8
Katie
“Why does the princess always need saving, Mommy? Is it ‘cause she’s a girl?” Lennon asks as we finish up the story of Snow White, which for some reason has been his favorite for a while. I’m not complaining. Before that, it was a PJ Masks’ book that drove me insane.
“Well—”
“Cause you’re a girl and you don’t need savin’. You do everything on your own.”
“I don’t exactly, pumpkin.”
“You do. That’s why I told Archer that I didn’t need a daddy because my mommy does everything by herself. We don’t need anyone else.”