Chapter 9
Long shot – An attempt to solve a mystery despite the low chance of success
“I’m here, I’m here,” Juniper announces as she darts inside of the storeroom at Aspen’s bookstore.
“The question is why we’re here,” Lilac says.
Juniper shrugs. “I assumed Aspen wanted to tell us she’s pregnant without any prying eyes around.”
“What?” Ellery squeals. “You’re pregnant?”
Aspen’s eyes widen to the size of saucers. “I’m not pregnant. Why would you think I’m pregnant?”
“Why else are we having a secret meeting in the storeroom?” Juniper asks.
Aspen smiles at me. “Because someone finally did the deed with her crush.”
“Yes!” Juniper jumps up and down. “I’m so happy for you,” she tells me before sticking her hand out to Ellery. “Pay up.”
Ellery scowls as she removes a five-dollar bill from her back pocket. I slap the money out of her hand.
“No one is paying up. Nothing happened.”
Lilac’s nose scrunches as she studies me. “Nothing happened? Rowan carried you out of the bar when you were drunk like you were his most prized possession—”
“And he has a super bowl ring,” Aspen interrupts to say.
Lilac clears her throat. “As I was saying, he carried you out of the bar like you were his most prized possession and nothing happened?”
“Oh, come on. Didn’t he help you to bed and then you accidentally pulled him into bed with you and your lips accidentally found his and voila commencement of sexy times?” Juniper waggles her eyebrows.
“That’s a whole lot of accidentally going on. You sound experienced in this accidental commencement of sexy times endeavor,” I say instead of admitting how I tried all of the above and got shot down by Rowan.
She shrugs. “What can I say? Accidents happen.”
Aspen bumps my shoulder. “Yeah, Ashlyn. Accidents happen. Did his penis happen to accidentally find its way inside you?”
“No. And what a non-sexy way to describe sex.” Trust me. As an erotic romance narrator, I’m an expert on ways to describe sex. “How many ways can I explain this to you? Nothing happened. He didn’t even make a move when he brought me breakfast in bed.”
“He made you breakfast in bed?” Juniper doesn’t wait for me to respond before she turns to Ellery. “New bet.”
I clap my hands to get everyone’s attention. “We’re not here to discuss my love life.”
“Of course not.” Lilac snorts. “It seems to be non-existent. You can hardly discuss a topic, which is non-existent.”
I frown at her. “Gee, thanks, Lilac Bean.”
“Why are you bringing out the middle name? I was merely stating the truth.”
Sigh. Lilac doesn’t mean to be hurtful, but her emotions don’t work the same way as other people. She’s not cold and unfeeling as some residents of Winter Falls would have you believe. She shows her emotions in different ways than most people is all. It can be abrasive, though, when she doesn’t understand what you’re going through.
Juniper huffs and crosses her arms over her chest as she taps her toe in impatience. “If we’re not here to re-hash every single second of a sexual encounter between Rowan and Ashlyn, and we’re not here to congratulate Aspen because she’s pregnant, what the hell are we here for?”
I’m not personally offended by Ms. Grumpy’s words. I know any time I force her away from her precious animals at the Wildlife Refuge, there’s a ninety-nine percent chance she’ll be annoyed. I feel sorry for any man who tries to capture her attention since she loves animals more than humans, including me and the rest of the family.
“It’s time to continue our adventure with The Mystery of the Black Hat Bandit’s Missing Loot,” I announce with a whoop.
“Yeah!” Aspen claps. “What did you find out? And don’t think I’m not still annoyed with you for going to the inn to search for clues without me.”