“What? No, Mommy, you have to come.” Lily’s eyes well-up with unshed tears.
I knew this would be hard, but the pain I’m feeling right now is excruciating. “When people get divorced, they don’t have holidays together anymore. The three of us have already had so much fun together. Now it’s your dad’s turn. When he leaves in a day or two, you’ll be right back with me again.”
“But, Mom, I thought we were going to have family time.” Liam sounds as sad as his sister.
Brett appears in the doorway, leaning against the frame. “Yeah, Harper, come on. I came forallof you. Let’s go have some family time.”
Brett is making me madder and madder. I shoot him a glare, then get down on my knees and pull my kids in for a hug. “I love you to pieces and I’ll see you soon. Come on, I’ll walk you to your dad’s car.”
With heads hanging low, they stumble out the front door. I’m still too raw from my bear encounter this morning to let them walk along the path without me.
Brett falls in step with me, and I know he’s working on the mother of all speeches. Whatever he plans to say, he’s going to get shut down. Hard.
Even thoughIdon’t want to ever have to see Brett’s stupid face again, I still ache to be where my kids are. More than that, I want to give Liam and Lily the family they deserve. But what kind of mother would I be if I let them think it’s okay to be treated the way Brett treats me?
My inner voice reminds me that the kids don’t know how Brett treats me. As far as they’re concerned, Mommy and Daddy decided not to love each other anymore and that’s why their family is falling apart. While I want nothing more than for them to know it’s not my fault, there’s no way I can be part of them hating their dad. Even though he’s taking the opposite tack—bending over backwards to make me look like the villain.
As we near the lodge, Moose stands up and bounds toward the kids. They hurry over to pet him, giving Brett a chance to plead with me without the kids hearing—his ego won’t allow him to be rejected in front of anyone, even if it is just a four- and an eight-year-old.
“Please, Harp.” Brett breaks into my thoughts. “Come with us. I know we can work this out if we really try.”
“I’ve done nothing but try, Brett. I’ve seen this song and dance too many times to ever fall for it again. It’s time for all of us to get used to the new normal. Go and have a nice time with the kids.”
Narrowing his eyes at me, he leans in. “Is this because of that guy you took off with? Are you staying here so you can be with him?”
“It’s none of your business who I spend my time with, Brett. Just like it’s no longer my business who you spend your time with.”
“You’re sleeping with him, aren’t you?” he demands hotly.
I laugh in his face. “I don’t know, Brett. Were you sleeping with Justine?” I’m purposefully giving him the wrong impression, but I’m so mad right now I’m half tempted to admit to a string of affairs I’ve never had just to put him in his place.
He inhales loudly like he’s going to yell, but then doesn’t. “It’s fine. I don’t even care if you did. Just, please come with us. Let’s be a family again.”
He knows the family card is playing dirty pool, yet it seems to be his only strategy. Steeling myself, I lift my chin. “No, Brett. Now, please go before the kids realize we’re arguing. And don’t forget to feed them.”
His head snaps back. “What kind of thing is that to say? Of course, I’m going to feed them.”
I ignore his hurt tone. I have never seen Brett prepare a meal for our children in their whole lives. “Bedtime is at eight,” I tell him. “Two books and two songs is their routine.”
“Harper …”
I spot a Mercedes SUV in the parking lot and know immediately that it’s Brett’s rental. Walking over to it, I call the kids to hop in as Brett unlocks and opens the doors using the key fob. I oversee the kids climbing in and getting buckled. Then, putting on the bravest smile I can muster, I tell them, “Have the best time ever. I love you to the moon and back and I’ll see you soon!”
Brett walks around to the driver’s side and gets in without another word to me. Thank heaven for small mercies.
I watch them pull out of the parking lot and onto the road. I feel like I can’t breathe. I hear the screen door to the lodge slam shut and I know instinctively it’s Digger, who was probably watching the entire thing.
I can’t face him. Not right now. Not when I need to fall apart. Because if I let myself, I’ll collapse into his strong arms and I’m afraid I’ll never want him to let me go. Putting my head down, I run down the path to the cabin before locking myself in. The tears come immediately.
Sliding down the wall, I let my body curl into a fetal position right there on the floor. I feel hollowed out and helpless. I don’t know how long I lay there, immobile in my impotence and grief. But when my telephone rings, I finally stir. It might be Brett calling with a question about the kids. God knows, I don’t have much faith that he’ll be able to handle them for any amount of time without me or a nanny to help.
But it’s Prisha’s picture that pops up on my screen, not Brett’s. I answer with, “You’ll never guess who showed up here.”
“I already know,” she tells me. “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for two days to tell you he was on his way. Next time you go camping in the wilderness, make sure there’s cell reception.”
“That would have defeated the purpose.”
“Good point. Just tell me I’m not too late to talk you out of letting that snake back in the door,” she says.