He inhales deeply before his lips touch me, and when they do, I feel his tongue peek out to run across the small spot he’s claimed. My fingers dig into his shoulders, where I’m holding on for dear life so I don’t melt at his feet because this is much more intimate than a kiss. His face is buried in my hair, and our bodies are so close that our clothes become a nuisance.
“Hale.” I gasp his name when I feel his teeth along the flesh under my jawbone.
His chest vibrates with a growl. “Say it again. Say my name again.” I realize that’s the first time I’ve voiced it out loud.
He nips the skin before moving closer to my ear, where his labored breathing matches mine. Turning my head slightly to get even closer, I whisper, “Hale,” like the answer to a prayer.
“Christ.” Holding me tighter, he takes a step forward, moving closer to the door, where the porch is illuminated only by the outside light, and we’re cloaked in a little more darkness. “I can’t wait to hear you crying my name out, begging for more.”
Frowning, his reference confuses me. “More of what?”
Pulling back, our eyes meet, and I see him searching for something. “More of us, more pleasure, more me.” With every word spoken, I can feel the throbbing of his length between us, almost like it’s trying to break free of the confines of his pants.
“Pleasure?” I can’t stop the word from popping out. I’ve never experienced pleasure from a man.
Until Hale, I didn’t think I ever would.
The way he touches me, kisses me, it makes me believe we could be like in the movies. Like we could both enjoy being together rather than him just taking what he wants and leaving me a painfilled mess of agony and regret.
“Fuck, you really are innocent, aren’t you?” The soft glide of his thumb moving up and down my throat as I swallow nervously gives me the courage to nod. I wish I were innocent in a whole different way, however. “We’ll go slow. It’s going to kill me, and my hand will be getting one hell of a workout, but I’ll wait for you, and when you’re ready for more, you just ask.”
I nod again, not knowing how to respond. Not yet, anyway. I understand I must tell Hale the truth about me before either of us becomes invested in the other, but I’m afraid to. What if he looks at me the same way I look at myself? I couldn’t handle it if he hated me as well.
“I need a picture.” His voice is strained. “Until I have you all to myself at night, I need something. Can I?” I love the way he’s always asking me for permission.
I concede and genuinely smile when he buries his face back in my neck, adsorbing my scent before licking me again. He’s wild when he’s like this, and I find myself attracted to his loss of control. Closing my eyes and leaning my head into his shoulder as he brings his hand up to snap a memory of this special moment, I imagine more nights like this.
Even being uncertain about getting involved with Hale, I can’t imagine a future where he’s not part of my life. As he begins to pull away, I move impulsively and kiss the spot beside his lips like he did to me earlier. Lingering for a second longer than necessary, I drop back onto my heels as he slowly steps back until he’s too far away to touch.
“Goodnight, Laken.”
“Goodnight, Hale.”
The door opens as he turns around, and Lauren leans against the frame, watching until he’s out of sight. “That was the hottest thing I’ve ever witnessed.”
As the person who experienced it, I have to agree. But I have questions, so many questions.
“Is it pleasurable?” I can’t look at her as I ask.
“What?” She steps out onto the porch into the light.
“Sex. For women, there’s pleasure?” I can only pull from what Mason and I did, which was always terrifying and painful. I hated every minute of it and would often pass out from shock.
Leaning against the wall next to me, Lauren clasps my hand in hers. “Yes, it should be. There should be consent and pleasure and so many more things. You shouldn’t fear sex, not the way you do. But given the reasons you do, I think you should have a conversation with Hale. Because I’m willing to bet he’ll ensure it’s a memorable experience for you.”
I want to believe her. I honestly do, especially after the way Hale and I were just touching and kissing. It feels like it should be something I’ll want to do repeatedly with him. Sadly, fear is a powerful motivator, and I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to give myself to a man like that again.
Hale
I’m a bastard.
A fucking bastard.
And I’m going straight to hell for what I’ve done.
It wasn’t intentional. I just wanted more time to observe Laken.
She was beautiful the way she asked me to kiss along her neck again. To give her something she obviously enjoyed because kissing is something she doesn’t. She didn’t say the words, but I understood the sentiment.