Inside the club, the pulsating beats of electronica drown out the toxic memories flashing through my mind. Accusations, tears, screams. Hell, I deserved all of it and more.
Forgiveness. I’d like to be worthy of it.
Someday.
But you saved someone that night, too.
Yes, Layla deVincenzo is still alive because of me. I protected her, brought her home to her family.
I brought Gabe home, too…just not in the same way.
I clench my fists. This shit will keep poisoning my mind until I drown it with some scotch.
Nico pulls me over to a table in a dark corner. My sister Shaye pops up from the couch, dressed head to toe in black leather. I smirk and kiss her forehead. “Aren’t you sweating your ass off in all that leather? What happens if you have to pee? Is it a Ross situation waiting to happen?”
She chuckles loudly, letting out a little snort and then sips the rest of whatever is in her glass. I cock an eyebrow at Nico. My baby sis is pretty damn hammered. It’s the only time she makes those unlady-like noises, and it’s funny as shit.
“You’re an asshole,” she slurs, poking a finger at my chest. “S-Sloane is coming, and she’s s-still pissed off at you for that bullshit on Thanks-sgiving.”
I rake a hand through my hair. “I tried to apologize.”
“Yeah, and how did you think that was gonna go over when Layla showed up half-naked?”
“I told her to stay out of sight.” I flop onto the couch, my head in my hands.
“You fucked up big this time.” Nico punches me in the shoulder. “You’re just lucky my dad didn’t exterminate you.”
“Yeah, I feel really lucky.” How ironic is that? I fuck shit up and Nico’s dad gives me a pass. My own father? He’d sell me out in a hot second for a fucking nickel.
“It wasn’t your fault about Gabe. You have to stop blaming yourself.” Nico hands me a shot glass of some amber-colored liquid, and I gulp it down. “Another,” I rasp, slamming it onto the table. He refills it and I shoot it, the fiery liquid sizzling as it slides down my throat.
“Easier said than done.”
Nico nods. “I know it’s been rough. But he made the choice to go after you. Nobody gave him an order. That’s always a risk we take when we walk into a situation we shouldn’t.” He lifts an eyebrow. “Shit happens. Bad shit.”
“If this is a pep talk, it’s not fucking working.” I rub my temples. “I just wanna block it all out.”
“Gabe was a good guy, but he knew what he was signing up for when he became part of the family.”
“He didn’t deserve it.”
“That doesn’t mean you go after Bonnaro again.” Nico narrows his eyes. “So don’t get any fucking ideas.”
“I don’t think we’re gonna have to go anywhere. I think they’re gonna come to us.”
Thankfully, Shaye is completely obliterated. This isn’t the kind of conversation we should be having anywhere in public, but it’s also the first time in two weeks that my best friend has spoken to me and not bitten my head off in the process. Shaye leans over and puts a hand on my arm. “Did you s-sleep with Layla, Max?” Yeah, she is oblivious to what we just covered. Good. She doesn’t need to worry about anything else right now.
I shake my head. “Fuck, no. She was just really scared and didn’t want to be alone.”
“That means she wanted to fuck you and you didn’t take the bait.”
I roll my eyes. “I didn’t lead her on. I told her she could stay in my bed, and I’d sleep on the couch. Was Sloane really pissed off because she thought I did?”
“Sloane showed up worried s-sick that you’d been lying in a ditch s-somewhere. Imagine how she felt when s-she saw Layla shaking her naked ass under one of your t-shirts, a t-shirt that Sloane bought for you, dumbass.”
“I know you’re not mentally with me right now, but I don’t get why she was so upset. We’re just friends. And that was her choice.”
Shaye shrugs and falls backward onto Nico. “Maybe s-she wants more.”