She sits at one of the tables facing me, and I don’t realize that I stall as I study her, absorbing her looks.
She looks exactly the same. Except her blond hair is not flat-ironed but frizzy and a mess. Someone’s t-shirt is too loose on her, and she looks more relaxed, unlike the pristine perfect Callie from Deene.
As if sensing my gaze, she raises her eyes and meets mine across the dining room, and my heart starts pounding like mad.
I look away and make enough noise to make it look like I am busy.
I can sense her gaze on me, and it makes my body tense like an iron rod. My skin blisters at the realization of her gaze.
I take a rag and start wiping the coolers, my eyes focused on my inked hand, black knuckles, and fingers.
I look like some gang member. But hey, that’s better than looking like something just chewed you up.
The humming of everyone’s low chatter is interrupted by loud laughter. It’s Ty. Our fucking sunshine. He is making new friends. And it’s nice to hear laughter. It’s nice to have “guests.”
“Hello, Kai.”
The voice makes blood shoot to my head.
It’s hers.
The sound of it right behind me makes me shiver.
I turn around slowly. I am on my knees with a fucking rag like a cleaning boy. But I straighten my shoulders and conjure the most indifferent demeanor as I give her a backward nod.
“Long time,” I say, holding her gaze.
It’s hypnotizing like it’s always been. The memories flash like a lightning bolt between us.
God, she is gorgeous.
I wanted her off this island as soon as I recognized her face. I want to hate her for what happened four years ago.
But there is another feeling trickling like a stream of water through the desert cracks. That feeling that made my heart pound like mad in my chest back at Deene every time our eyes met. That made me scan her social pictures for hours at a time. That same feeling that made me jerk off at the thought of her more often than a fucking porn addict.
That feeling is back.
And I hate myself for it.
I realize we stare at each other for too long, and I drop my gaze and carry on with the coolers.
She doesn’t say anything else and is being called over to the table.
Gone.
Good.
I exhale in relief like I’ve been holding my breath for the longest time.
Bo gathers everyone. My ears are turning into locators, trying to catch every word.
The sun is getting higher, and the heat is rising. Sweat gathers on my forehead. I am sticky. The sand scratches my knees. But the only thing I feel is—
Anticipation.
Yeah, it’s fucked up.
It brings me back to that day after the Block Party when I saw her in the hallway for the last time in my life. The day we should’ve talked but never did. The day when I frantically texted and called her, and she never answered. The day that could’ve fixed the night before but instead ruined both our lives.