Maddie
I swirlthe straw around in my glass of Sprite, wishing I was anywhere but here.
What was I thinking?
I press my lips together to stop the sigh from escaping, and remind myself why I’m here.
I’m here because I told myself I wouldn’t give up finding a date for Elouise’s wedding.
I’m here because I want a boyfriend, someone to share my life with.
I’m here because I want to move forward.
But I’m miserable because the man across from me isn’t Axel.
Axel.
My date is still talking about fishing. Seriously, I thought the profile pic of him with a fish was justthat thing guys do, not his entire personality. But apparently it is.
Tuning him out, I think about the man that I wish was sitting across from me. The burly, quiet, tattooed man, who has more in common with the Big Bad Wolf than any sort of fox. Silver or otherwise.
I lift a hand from my glass and rub at my chest.
I shouldn’t have worn Axel’s sweatshirt this week. I should’ve burned it. Or at least washed it. But when I finally made it home Monday – after my mortifying Tropical Contraceptive Adventure – I went straight to my room, grabbed the hoodie, and curled up on my bed with the soft Axel scented material pulled up over my head.
There’s no reasonable explanation for how soothing it was for me. But who am I to argue with the Universe and her witchy ways?
So I didn’t question it. I just started using his shirt as a blanket.
Then I started wearing it around the house.
And today I just wore it to work.
Sure, it’s big. Humongous even. But people buy oversized clothing all the time, and no one questioned me.
And if I wasn’t on this stupid-ass date, I’d be wearing it right now.
Except I am here, and I promised myself I would try.
But I couldn’t bring myself to wear something that revealed a lot of skin, so I chose this almost turtleneck tank. It’s ultra form-fitting so I figured that made up for the lack of neckline and tucked into my high-waisted navy pants I thought I looked pretty damn good.
Then I sat down across from Fish Guy and was reminded that this outfit shows all my bulges as soon as I sit. So now I’m slightly hunched over, scooted in as close to the table as I can get, hoping to cover my belly rolls, while pretending that I’m not bored to tears.
I take another sip of my Sprite.
If ever there was a situation that called for alcohol, this is it. But I need to keep my wits about me so I don’t do anything stupid tonight. Like ask Fishy for a ride home. Or reactivate my other dating app so I can message Brian and ask if Axel is busy tonight. Which is precisely why I canceled that account and signed up on a new site.
I thought coming to the same place was a good idea. Like it could act as some sort of control group for my dates. But being here just makes me think of Axel.
And the way those blue eyes would bore into me.
And the way he pressed his lips-
“Excuse me.”
A voice jolts me out of my daydream and I look up to see a familiar server standing next to our table with a tray.
One glance at my date tells me he’s no longer talking and is now busy on his phone.