I head over to my vanity, yanking open the top drawer. My pills. These sweet babies have saved my life dozens of times. Without them, I would have been discovered long ago.
I probably would have already been dead by now.
It’s a crime to lie about one’s designation, especially if you’re an omega. Martina’s punishment won’t be so severe. She’s an alpha in the end.
I don’t even know why she pretends to be beta. She already has it made.
She may struggle to find a partner since male omegas are rare, but she doesn’t even need to be in this dump. Why the hell was she ever jealous of me?
I pluck up a pill and pop it into my mouth, and its strong, acidic taste coats my tongue. I didn’t even bother with water.
I took a pill this morning too. Two a day, my dealer had said. Yet why am I perfuming? Why did I dry hump that alpha like a horny dog?
It’s like my body is craving knots and shit...
I recheck the container and my heart plummets to the deepest, darkest depths of my stomach.
These are not hormone suppressants. These are hormone stimulants!
My hand shakes. Who switched my pills?
Martina’s warning echoes back to me.“You’ll see...”
That bitch. She stole my pills and replaced them with hormone stimulants! No wonder I was sweating like a pig on that pole.
I knew something was wrong the moment I walked onto that stage, and why didn’t I see the signs?
My heart thumps in my ears as I hold on to the edges of my vanity, gazing at my swollen pupils in the mirror.
All I can think about is finding that blond alpha again and impaling myself on his mammoth-sized cock. I’m worse than a bitch in heat.
Shit.Heat.
I am going into pre-heat.
The cramps begin. I double over, grabbing a hold of my stomach. They’re only just the beginning, though. A warm-up.
When my real heat begins, I won’t even be able to stand on my own two feet. The first cramp will hit like a wave, and before I know it I’ll be drowning in a sea of burning, white-hot pain.
Yet the pain has nothing on the emptiness—that bleak, echoing abyss that lives rent free inside me whenever my heat arrives.
All I need is a big, fat knot, and the pain and the hollowness will go away. But I refuse. If I can survive my first heat alone in the mud, then I can survive this.
This heat will be awful. After all, it’s artificial and brought on by drugs. Plus, I've been taking hormone suppressants all year, popping pills into my mouth like it’s the 1990s, and I have to get away.
I cannot stay here while I am vulnerable. The pain is enough to incapacitate an omega for days.
I will be like a dying buffalo in the desert, surrounded by vultures. Except these vultures won’t even wait until I’m dead before they swoop in.
Time for Buttercup to get her ass out of here.
Gripping my suitcase, I make a beeline for the door. Unfortunately, I forgot to fasten the latch, and now my belongings scatter all over the floor.
“Fuck!”
I drop to my knees to gather my possessions. Someone bangs at the door, and my body freezes. My mouth dries up when I catch the scent of burnt toast.
It’s Steve.