She took them and went to the bathroom without a word. I was pretty sure she was in shock now that the whole thing was over. She had that faraway look in her eyes that meant her brain had shut itself down for protection.
I cursed myself for snapping. I needed to be more gentle with her. She’d had a shitty fucking night.
I sat on the edge of my bed and waited. Charlotte hadn’t closed the bathroom door all the way, and through the crack I could see her reflection in the mirror. She pulled her shirt over her head, revealing the same full breasts I’d seen in her text message the other night, although held up by a bra this time. I tried to look away, but then she shimmied out of her jeans and gave me a glimpse at her magnificent ass. Her white cotton panties were jammed up inside her cheeks, leaving nothing to the imagination. I knew I shouldn’t look, but I couldn’t take my eyes off her.
I wanted her. I wanted her more badly than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life.
She walked out of the bathroom slowly. She had squeezed the water out of her hair, but it still hung wetly down her back. My big shirt was just long enough to cover her panties, but it left her legs bare all the way up to the tops of her thighs. Her skin was creamy and smooth, begging to be touched…
“I gave you a pair of shorts,” I said. My throat was dry.
“They’re too big. They fall right off. The shirt is good enough until I’m dry.”
I jumped up and took the shorts from her. “Here. Sit down.” I put a hand on her back and led her over to my table. She dropped down and stared straight ahead while I dabbed at her cheek with an alcohol wipe. I tried my best not to look at the sliver of her panties peeking out from underneath the shirt.
“That doesn’t sting?” I asked with a smile. “You barely flinched.”
“It doesn’t hurt as much as a biker trying to extort me for sex,” she said softly.
“He can’t hurt you anymore.” I peeled open a Band-Aid and placed it on her cheek. “I promise.”
“Is it true?” she asked.
“If Flop and I are able to take care of it tonight, then yeah. There’s a good chance we’ll get out of this mess.”
“No,” she said, looking me in the eye. There was an expression behind her beautiful eyes that I couldn’t place. “Is it true that… you’re falling for me?”
I started to laugh as if it were a joke, but then I froze.She was in the bed of my truck. She heard everything I said on the way home. When I was berating myself.
“Well?” she said, sitting very still. Nothing moved but her mouth. “Aren’t you going to say anything? Jayce?”
“Not much to say.” I ran my thumb across the edge of the Band-Aid to wipe away a droplet of blood that had smeared on her cheek. Her skin was warm and soft. “No offense, Peaches, but I’ve got more important stuff on my mind tonight.”
“I am, too,” she blurted out. “I have feelings for… yeah. The same as you, I guess. It scares me. I shouldn’t feel this way, but Jayce…”
I held up a hand.Don’t make this harder than it has to be, Peaches.
“It doesn’t matter,” I said firmly. “We can’t do anything. Now, more than ever, we’ve got to lay low. One mistake means the Copperheads will kill you.”
But she was shaking her head while I spoke. “Theyknow. We have nothing to lose.”
“We have plenty to lose. I’m taking care of Carl. Don’t worry.”
“What if you can’t?” she demanded, eyebrows furrowed and a fire in her eyes. Even with her hair matted to her head and her mascara running, she was beautiful. The kind of woman who entered a room and caused everyone to stop what they were doing to stare. “What if you can’t take care of it, and the Copperheads find out? What if they’re going to kill me to get to you regardless?”
I stood and walked to the sink to pour a glass of water, if only to give myself time to think. I’d been through so much shit. I’dseenso much shit, terrible things no man ought to see. It was the reason I’d quit the Copperheads. And then what they’d done to Theresa, and threatening me every day, making me feel like there was a freshly-dug grave waiting for my body.
I’d been walking around like a dead man all this time. Like there was a number over my head, the number of days I had until Sid killed me, and it was slowly dwindling to zero. I’d accepted it. After Theresa’s death, I didn’t even mind. My fate was sealed, and there was nothing I could do about it.
But Charlotte made me want to fight back.
She made me want tolive.
I stood in front of the sink, my back to her, and drank my glass of water slowly. Hoping that each gulp would bring me closer to clarity about what I should do.
I finished my glass without an answer.
When I turned around, Charlotte was standing a foot away from me. Smiling at me with those pouty lips, her eyes full of hope.