I shook my head. I did not need anyone else to witness my humiliation. When my bride awakened, I would tell her that I was broken. Alone. I looked at the doctor. “I will explain to her how things are, and then I will bring her to you, Doctor. She must be matched to a worthy Atlan and—”
He interrupted, shaking his head. “No. She has thirty days to decide. Not you. It is not your decision. That’s Coalition protocol. Nothing I can do about it unless you want to take it up with the Prime.”
Prime Nial, leader of the entire Coalition of Planets. He’d visited the Colony and was, himself, contaminated. Mated through the Brides Program to a human. He would think me foolish or weak.
Perhaps both. I turned away from the doctor. He chose not to argue further and motioned for the transport officer to follow him out of the room so that I was alone. Staring at her. My perfect match. A woman who should have been mine.
Even though she was right in front of me, close enough I could see her breathing, the little indentation at her elbow, even a perfect little birthmark on her collarbone, the Hive had stolen not just my home, but my future. My mate. Her.
Her dark lashes fluttered on her cheeks, and her eyes opened slowly. Blinking like an innocent babe taking in her new world. She recovered quickly, and I admired the keen intelligence I saw coming through her warm brown eyes when her gaze focused on me. I bowed slightly. “Welcome to the Colony, my lady.”
She pushed herself up and swung her legs around so she sat with her arms wrapped around her knees and looked up at me. “I'm CJ. Caroline Jane, actually, but my friends call me CJ.”
“I am not your friend.” I held her gaze not to intimidate, but because I found I could not look away. She was just so lovely and…mine. “I am Warlord Rezzer, Caroline. I am here to escort you to medical.”
Her finely arched brows drew closer together. She frowned. The sight oddly enchanting. “What do you mean, escort me to medical? I thought my mate would be waiting for me here. That's what Warden Egara promised me. Have I been transported to the wrong place?”
I held out my hand, worried that she would see right through me, see exactly how broken I was and refuse to even touch me. She studied my open palm just for a second and then placed her warm hand in mine so I could help her to her feet. It was so small, tiny even, in my palm. “There has been an unusual circumstance,” I told her as she glanced at me out of the corner of her eye. I assisted her off the platform.
“So you’re not my mate?”
I shook my head, ground my teeth together before I replied. “No. We were matched, but I am not able to claim you.”
That stopped her cold, and she pulled back on my hand, forcing me to look at her. Into her dark, almost black eyes. If I wasn’t careful, I’d sink right in.
“What do you mean? How is that possible? Warden Egara said we were matched.”
A bit of the numbness faded but not enough, and I accepted the inevitable—even being near my mate would not be enough to break me free of this new prison. I brought her hand to my lips and kissed it because I needed just one taste before I let her go. “I was captured in the caves beneath the planet’s surface a few weeks ago. They—the Hive—did something to me.”
She frowned and her eyes filled with worry. All I felt was broken. Ashamed to have to explain my weakness in such detail.
“What? What could be so terrible that you don’t want a mate?”
The admission was like acid in my throat, but I forced the words past it. “I can no longer become my beast. I can no longer claim my mate, and so I must allow you to choose another. I must ensure your happiness. You will be mated to a full Atlan. Strong enough to protect you.”
Her grip on my hand tightened. “No.”
“What?”
“I said no. N.O. As in, no. I do not agree to this.” Her soft voice was laced with steel, surprising me.
“I am unfit, Caroline.”
“It’s CJ,” she countered.
My eyes widened at her tone, realizing she wasn’t as meek as I’d assumed.
“And Warden Egara said you were my perfect match. The best match in the entire Interstellar Fleet. She said you’re mine. If you’re mine, you can’t just hand me around like a Tupperware dish filled with week-old casserole.” She was angry now, her eyes narrowed. The sparks flying from them made her even more beautiful.
I snapped my mouth shut, not remembering when it had fallen open. “What is a Tupperware dish?”
She pulled her hand free and crossed her arms, the swells of her breasts rising with the action. “It’s a worthless piece of plastic I use to run science experiments in my fridge. Listen, I’m not a used car. I’m not property. You don’t get to just give me to someone else.”
I tilted my head, confused by her anger. “Of course, you are not property. You are beautiful. A worthy female. A perfect match for an Atlan Warlord. Which means you are strong, intelligent and courageous. I am unworthy, my lady. I would be selfish beyond reason to keep you.”
Some of the anger faded from her dark eyes, and she stepped in front of me, tilting her head back. She lifted her hands to my face, and I allowed her to touch me. To tilt my head down. To pull me to her until our foreheads nearly touched. “What is wrong with you? Exactly?” she asked. “What is so terrible that you would not accept a matched mate?”
“I cannot summon my beast.”