Wild laughter punctuates the silence in my brain.
Hell, no. Now I’ve tasted her I want more. So much more.
And I know this is bad...so very, very bad. I should have sent her back to her room. But I’ve never wanted anyone like I want her. It would be like Santa gifting you something you’ve wanted for an entire lifetime and you saying, Thanks, but no thanks.
I’m not that stupid.
And you don’t think this is more stupid...?
I drown out the inner scorn with an all-consuming kiss, and she gives a blissful murmur deep within her throat.
‘You sound sleepy...’ I say.
‘Do I?’
It’s all husky and filled with post-coital warmth.
I stretch out beside her, her back to my front, and hold her to me, nuzzle the skin beneath her ear. ‘Yes.’
She gives a soft little laugh, her arms wrapped over mine. ‘I’m still on Malaysian time. I don’t think I’ve slept properly for days.’
‘Then sleep.’
‘But you... I want to...’ She draws the words out, all hushed as she snuggles in closer, and the teasing friction of her bum is enough to make my eyes roll.
‘Sleep, Summer.’
It’s practically a growl in her ear, and she gives the softest murmur of agreement, sleep claiming her whether she wants it to or not.
And I relax against her, savour the warmth of her body, her scent on the air. She feels so right like this. In my arms. She always did. Even as friends there was an ease with which we’d touch, hug, collapse on a bed together...often laughing. I press a kiss to her hair, breathe her in...
That was before she broke you, though.
I squeeze my eyes shut to the pain. Remind myself that this is temporary. Tell myself it’s better to have shared something instead of nothing...but not everything.
Because to make love to her fully and let her walk away, as I know she one day will...
I don’t think I could come back from that.