Jax smirked. I did adore that expression. “We’ve talked about you. A lot.” He looked past me to Grayson. “It was bad enough when one of us was smitten, but then he had to go and fall for you too.”
“Smitten?” I loved it. It was such a sweet, innocent word.
“Yes. And I understand your hesitation around being with both of us. When Grayson introduced me to the idea, way back when, I struggled with it too. Except it meant I could keep loving him and not give up on you.”
There was something in his words, the catch in his voice, that made my heart skip. I couldn’t find a response.
Jax kicked away from the wall, walked up to me, and took my hand. “I tried to move on. Told myself it was pathetic that I couldn’t get over a teenage crush. And I thought I had, until you were back in my life. I never came close to feeling about anyone the way I did about you. Until Grayson, and even now he lives in a separate place in my heart.
This wasn’tdating and seeing where things go. He had a distinct destination in mind, and had for a while. I should be terrified or intimidated. Instead, I was settling into the relief that had been missing for weeks. “I’m sorry I believed the worst about you for so long. And that I don’t have nearly so poetic a confession to make.”
“That wasn’t poetry, and all I need from you, ever, is the truth.”
The truth. Should have been simple at any point along the way, but it always got muddled. Now it finally seemed so clear. “I’m glad you came back into my life. Chase’s life, I guess. But he doesn’t get any credit for this. Despite what I thought you’d done, I was happy to see you again. But I never dared think about you on that same level again. The hurt never left, and knowing now that it was misguided...” I wasn’t going to tumble into hypotheticals. I had to remember that.
“You’re committed to this idea now, of all of us,” Jax said. “Because once you get past the hesitation, it feels really good. But you should know, it’s hard falling for someone who already loves another person.”
“I get that.” I’d beengetting thatfor years. “Believe me, I understand it implicitly.”
Jax cradled my cheek against his palm. “Holding back all this time... Let’s just say it’s taught me infinite patience. But that day we hooked up, finally, the restraints snapped. I want you both, and I’m so happy you’re good with that. I love you, Dee Dee.”
I gazed back at amber eyes I used to think were cruel. Instead, he was as guarded as I was. “I hate that we wasted so much time.” I had to say it. Voicing the regret made it easier to move past. “But we’ve got a lot of time ahead of us. And I love you too.” Was I allowed to say that already? He said it first, but I meant it. Few things in my life felt more real or certain. Especially with Jax watching me in adoration, and Grayson wrapping his arms around my waist from behind.
Jax slid his hand to the back of my neck, and crashed his mouth into mine. “I’m glad you wanted to do this here.” He murmured between nibbles on my lips. “Because we’re probably not letting you leave for a few days.”
I leaned into Jax’s kiss, letting the love and passion fill me. I turned to steal one from Grayson too. I’d almost walked away from this.
But I hadn’t. That was what mattered.
Jax nudged my sweater up, and I stepped out of his grasp with a smile.
“It occurs to me,” or it was doing so as I spoke, “that having two boyfriends, who are also dating each other, means I get to watch you together.” Which had recently become one of my favorite sights.
“What, specifically, do you want to watch?” Jax asked.
I hadn’t gotten into that many details yet. My fantasies tended to focus more on my pleasure. That would be changing. “Kissing... and nakedness and stuff?”
“All right.” Jax sounded far too casual.
Grayson kissed him in a way I recognized. His fingers gripping the short strands of Jax’s hair. Their mouths dancing hungrily together.
It wasn’t just the watching that sang to my soul, it was knowing how it felt when Grayson did that. Being able to place myself in the middle of that kiss. And seeing how much they both enjoyed it.
There was no hesitating, only frantic desperation as they stripped off each other’s shirts. Bare, well-defined chests molded to each other. They groped one another through their jeans.
Jax made quick work of Grayson’s belt and zipper. He slid his hands under Grayson’s waistband, to grab Grayson’s ass and pull him closer. The kissing never paused for more than a second or two.
Until Jax broke away, to drop to his knees. When he worked Grayson’s cock free, I whimpered. It earned me a pair of twin smirks that faded when Jax took Grayson into his mouth.
I’d never been this turned on by something like porn. Grayson fucking Jax’s mouth. The hunger. The enthusiasm. The low groans that reached deep inside me and stroked my every nerve ending.
Grayson’s hips thrust in time with breaths that were growing shorter and more shallow. “Stop.” He forced the word through gritted teeth, and pulled back from Jax, who stood.
Grayson turned to me, shaft at full mast, lust splashed across his face. “Come here.”
I couldn’t argue an order like that. The instant I was within his reach, he grabbed my hips, and kissed me hard. I swore something ripped with the desperation he used undoing my jeans.
He shoved my clothes to the ground, the fabric scraping along my thighs on the way down. “Being away from you for so many days...” his voice was strained, “... turns out absence makes the dick grow harder.”