Chapter Seventeen
Staying off socialmedia for the couple of days leading up to Christmas was easier than I expected.
Not picking up the phone and calling Grayson when I wanted to head out to breakfast Christmas Eve was excruciating.
Every single interview I’d had lined up with Hollywood costume designers had fallen through. One even told me if I wormed my way into the industry under a different name, I needed to remember what a close-knit community they were, and that they wouldn’t tolerate someone bullying them.
Iwas the one bullying. Right.
I hadn’t lost everything; not even close. I still had friends. My family. My channel. And it was Christmas—my favorite holiday of the year. My parents had gone on a cruise this year, but Chase and I would still have lunch at their house. He was cooking and he liked their kitchen better than his own.
And Anne would be there, the way she had been for almost as long as I could remember. Her home life had been dark and painful when she was a kid. Mom and Dad made sure she had an escape, including spending Christmas with us.
Jax and Grayson would be there too. I was ambivalent about seeing them again. Which was why I was laying on my bed, memorizing the patterns in my wallpaper and the way my holiday lights cast shadows, rather than getting ready for lunch.
“You still here?” Lyn called as she knocked.
I sat up. “Yeah. Come in.”
Lyn stepped into my room. She was wearing the empire waist blouse I’d made her, and a drug store Santa hat. We’d exchanged gifts last night. “I’m out of here. Do you need anything?” She was heading to her own family’s house for the rest of the day.
Answers. Direction. A way to make things right with Grayson and Jax. “I’m good.”
“Okay.” She didn’t sound convinced. “I left a tray of treats on the kitchen table for you to bring. Tell everyone I saidMerry Christmas.”
I forced a smile. “Thank you. Tell Hollie and Alex the same.” I hadn’t made cookies to send her parents, but I did make sure she had a bottle of their favorite whiskey.
“I will.” Lyn hesitated. “Are you sure...”
I climbed from my bed. “I appreciate everything. Go. Have fun. I’ll see you tonight.”
She left and I needed to be on my way too. I should have gone half an hour ago.
My parent’s house was only fifteen minutes away. Ten minutes when the roads were this empty. Everyone else’s cars were in the driveway when I arrived. I steeled myself. Things had been awkward with Jax at these things, a few years ago when he and Chase started talking again. This wouldn’t be much different, and I could spend most of my time with Anne.
I didn’t want it to work that way, but if the situation was too tense, that was the plan.
“Hey.” Anne saw me the instant I stepped inside, and she joined me. “Chase was about to send out the search parties.”
“Sorry about that. I was... stuff.” Wow. Brilliant, me.
She took the bag of gifts from me that hung from one arm. “I’ll put these under the tree.”
I gave her a grateful smile, and retreated to the kitchen to stash the treats from Lyn.
Chase gave me a quick hug, and pointed me toward the dining room. Apparently I was late enough that it was time to eat.
I sat next to Anne, disappointment swelling inside when Grayson refused to make eye contact with me. Jax spared me a glance, but nothing more.
The food was incredible. Not that I was surprised. Chase managed to outdo himself every year. The conversation—or lack thereof—was excruciating. It was limited to Anne and Chase talking about the game Rinslet was pushing back, and everyone else occasionally asking someone to pass the salt or butter.