Unpredictably, instead of lashing back on Vivienne’s cutting words, Blair just settled it by muttering something under her breath. An apology, it surewasn’t.
These two bickered like two old maids. One would think they’d get over it as we got older. But no, they go at it almost each time we were together. The same thing happened at my father’s funeral. They harped on everything. My birthday celebration wasn’t an exception. Sometimes, I wondered how these two survived without me as their referee. They’d most likely have murdered each other over a tedious subject, like who was wearing what color at a party. Given that our styles in clothing were alike, we had to plan ahead of schedule so that no one ended up being anyone’s second-ratedoppelganger.
“You two need to zip it. Save it for Sunday brunch, okay. You guys can have a ball insulting each other then. But for the time being, I beg of you, shutitdown.”
“Case closed,” Blair uttered,unruffled.
Vivienne shrugged. “I second that,” she stated before drinking the rest ofherwine.
Eyes flickering between the two, a satisfied smile graced my lips. “See, silence is fucking golden, isn’t it? Now, it’s not a crime not to bicker for a week. You guys should really try it. It might be nice for a change. Gentle on my nerves andears,too.”
They both stared at me as if I’d lost my damn mind. Okay, I guess a truce lasting a week was just too much to ask. Nevermind,then.
“You know, I’m curious, Gi…” Vivienne glanced at me eagerly. “Tonight, when you did the nasty, did the sex make it or break it? How was he, I mean. Is he just as amazing as they said he was? Did he blow your mind?” She grilledfurther.
Disclosing Jared’s sexual expertise had been vague. I didn’t like to kiss and tell. However, I managed to disclose the important bits, but I was not one to truly spill everything. I believed in preserving one’s bedroom privacy when it came to intimacy. But since Yovanna had announced to the world how Jared was the best sex of her life, Vivienne’s idle curiosity wasunderstandable.
“He is…um…very passionate.” The man lit me inside. Even now, I still could feel him within my body. He’d marked me. No man could match him. “It really is the polar opposite of Jack’s, without question. And I admit, as stupid as this sounds, it’s worth it—he’s worth it. Every single time. I can’t let him go…not now…not after tonight.” Airing out my heart’s burden and how I intended to go on carrying on a torch for him made them fleetingly glance at one another. From the knowing looks they just shared, I could already grasp their minds swirling with prosandcons.
“And Wyatt? Where does he stand in any of this?” It was Vivienne who voiced out her concern at my tangled web of a love life…if one could callitsuch.
Before I managed to answer, Blairinterruptedme.
“My brother’s been fixated on you. I knew he was a disgusting tool when I found him jacking off to a picture of you two years ago, so he stands nowhere, Vivienne. Just as he should.” Blair’s displeasure at her randy big brother jacking off to my photograph absolutely traumatized her. No words needed. Her priceless expression saiditall.
I choked on my saliva. “What the fuck, Blair! Give us a warning next time. Shit, man.” I couldn’t breathe. I was dying from laughter. The picture flashing in my head was too hysterical. None of us could ever look at Wyatt the sameagain.
All three of us shared a good chuckle. It was nice to have a laugh again. I’d forgotten how it felt. So, for a short reprieve, the hollowness in my heart lightened its weight, letting me breathe a little freely fromoverburden.
When we settled down, their interrogation was far from over. Blair, though she liked Jared, still had reservations about my over clinginess. She deemed it unhealthy. As for Vivienne, she was too curious about my odd bond with my fakehusband.
“Is Jared planning on working things with you? Did you just discuss it even?” Vivienne quietly asked as I casually smiled at the passersby going back and forth into the garden and back inside thehouse.
Without glancing at them, I shook my head, feeling the weight of darkness settle on my chest once again. “We did discuss it, and no, he’s not planning on anything with me—well, apart from running away from me as far as he could possibly imagine, Iguess.”
She let out a hissing sound, peeved. “So…the whole sex thing tonight…Is it just a once a year birthday thing, then? I don’t fucking get why, Gi. Why the fuck are you holding on to a man who has no interest in being with you? Sure, he loves to fuck you once in a blue moon, but where is he now? He’s most likely back with that Rose chick. He’s back in her bed. So why the hell are you holding onagain?”
“I honestly don’t know.” I understood Vivienne’s argument. It wasn’t unfounded. Truth be told, I, too, had the same reasons, but tonight had changed it all. He only needed to touch me, and I was his again. Sadly, it seemed Jared knew it, too. Based on his ardent lovemaking earlier, he couldn’t get enough of me. But this was Jared, after all. Mercurial as ever. He could very well change his tune any time of the week, depending on his ever-shifting mood. “He wants me, but he doesn’t want to want me. It’s the same spiel since we got married. Nothing’s changed…on his part,still.”
“Fucking hell, Gisele. You’re hopeless as hopeless gets.” Vivienne wrapped her arms around me before kissing the side of my head. “You’re the ultimate package—hot as fuck, models envy you, you’ve got the brains to back it up, and not to mention you’re mega rich—and even with all that, you’re not rich where it counts most.” She sighed, her arms winding around me more tightly. “If all else fails, you have Blair and me to distract you for the rest of your life. So fear not, my dearest babes, wegotyou.”
After she released me, Blair shoved a newly filled champagne glass at me before she granted me an appeasing gaze. “Sooner or later, you have to decide, Gi.” She succinctly pointed out. “You can’t go on for another year living in this hell. Waiting on a man who doesn’t see your worth only leads to devastation—your very own destruction. Next time he fucks up, just let it go. If he comes back, then renegotiate terms, but if he doesn’t, just forget you’re married to him. You keep forgettingthisis a business deal. Jared sure hasn’t. If you want to stay afloat and not drown, you’ve got to think like him. Think like a man. Fight fire with fire. I’m sorry, but sometimes, being a pseudo-doormat isn’t all that appealing. Not even to me. Most especially with his kind of breed. They thrive on the chase, but you’ve never ever let him chase you because you’re already laid out like a six-course meal, ready whenever he comes knocking on your doorstep. Seriously, Gisele, get a fucking grip! I love you, but this is beyond pathetic. He’s supposed to be eating out of the palm of your hands. The only sure thing he’s eating is your fucking confidence. You’ve got to get back on the saddle, or you’re going to be left behind, Gi. It’s time to take the blindfoldoff,babe.”
“Amen to that,” Vivienne readily agreed. “We all adore Jared, but he’s been leading you nowhere. If he doesn’t come crawling back to you after you guys tangoed, it’s time to ditch your heart andmoveon.”
Tentatively, I smiled without it reaching my eyes. “Of course, I totally agree. Just give me time. I’ll eventually get there,” I murmured, knowing full well they were speaking with sense. They only wanted mehappy…
They’d supported me since, but I knew this one-way love made me pitiful in their eyes somehow. Maybe that was why Blair seemed surprisingly obliging towards my revelation of Wyatt. She knew where my heart belonged. She also knew I wasn’t going into a relationship with Wyatt knowing such a fact. I was stuck in a rut, but I was giving Jared one last chance. Japan should be a game changer. Good or bad, a decision had tobemade.
While Blair and Vivienne continued discussing other matters, arguing about gatecrashers and what not, I spotted someonefamiliar.
“Ginny! You came!” I greeted my research partner for Robotics, whom I invited at the last minute since the woman had hardly warmedtome.
She seemed hesitant as she cautiously eyed the themed surroundings, unmistakably uncomfortable. When her light blue eyes found me, she appeared confused for a moment. “Oh, my gosh! Gisele?” she blew out a breath. “Wowzers, you were pretty before, but gosh! You totally could pass as a supermodel. Who thought you were hiding such big tits underneath thesweaters?”
Our class started super early. Sweater and jeans were the accommodating wear that could match my unpleasant mood. Early riser, I sure wasn’t, but it was the last slot available, so I was left functioning like a retarded robot until caffeine kicked in, which unfortunately, tended to take effect half an hour after boosting. Ginny had learned to cope on her ownuntilthen.
I beamed before throwing her a massive heartwarming hug. “You mean a super hooker, right? Thank you for coming. Most of the people here are from school, but I hardly know any of them. You’re the first friendly faceIknow.”