It was one thing to get into an altercation with your cellmate in private, but it was a whole other thing to get into it with them where others could hear. I made sure to whisper but still kept the sternness in my voice.
Reggie moved to pull the door to our cell in some without closing it. He walked back toward me and grabbed my arm to pull me into the corner of the cell. I yanked my arm away as soon as we were in the corner. He looked at me and then scrubbed his hand down his face.
“I’m your father.”
His revelation nearly knocked the air out of me.
“What?”
“Don’t go deaf now! You heard me! Your mother is Vivian Marie Valentine. Your nana is Gloria Valentine, and your Pops is Cleveland Valentine. Your last name is Valentine because your mother and Charles were never married. Your mother and I grew up in the same neighborhood, so we always knew each other. We started dating secretly after Torrey was born. We didn’t let people know about our relationship because I never wanted a target on her back because of me being so outspoken and radical. Charles was a good friend of mine, and he knew how much I loved your mother, but I had to get ghost after the incident with the cop. I didn’t tell her I was leaving. I thought it was for the best. I couldn’t take her with me. That was a mistake. I went back to Saint Louis after I’d been gone for several years. I found out where Vivian and Charles were living and visited them. I told her I loved her, and she told me she was in love with Charles, so I left them alone. I was arrested shortly after that visit. My son's mother mentioned there was a kid that visited the old neighborhood from time to time. She said that he looked like me. I blew it off because I hadn’t been with any woman other than Vivian, and I knew she would've told me if we had a kid. At least I thought she would've.”
I was stunned into silence. I knew Charles was not my biological father, but he took care of us like he was. Torrey’s father was killed in a motorcycle accident before she was born. My mother never gave many details about my father except he wasn’t ready for the responsibility of fatherhood and he left. She never mentioned his name. I didn’t press the issue because Charles was a good man. I didn’t want to make him feel unappreciated by me constantly inquiring about a man who never wanted me anyway. Charles and my mother were not married. She said they’d planned on getting married, but he died before it could happen.
“How do you know I am your son?”
“Man come on. Have you not noticed how much you look like me? When I saw the picture of your mother, I immediately knew who you were. A man always knows his seed even if he tries to pretend he doesn’t. Then I saw the look in Viv’s eyes when she saw me. It confirmed it for me.”
I backed away from him and sat down on my bed. I did notice that Reggie and I favored. I saw a picture of him when he was younger, and I almost thought I was looking at myself in the photo. I didn’t mention the resemblance. I thought my mind was playing tricks on me. Never in a million years would I figure he was my father.
“I asked for you to be moved to my cell when I figured out who you were.”
“Why didn’t you tell me when we first met?”
“I wanted to wait for the right time to discuss it with you. I didn’t want it to be like this, but when I saw Viv, I felt nostalgia and anger all at the same time. I was mad because she fell in love with someone else and let him raise my first-born son. The nostalgia kicked in when I looked into her eyes and saw the woman that I was deeply in love with. Honestly, I know it was best she and Charles raised you. There is no way I could have been the father you needed me to be, not then anyway.”
“I need to talk to my mother. I can’t believe she kept something like this from me. She had no right to lie to me! I’m in here because I wanted to protect her, and she has lied to me my whole life!”
“El, it was for the best, man. I couldn’t father you from in here or on the run. Viv is an amazing woman, and she raised you right. I’m not saying don’t be mad, but you should cut her some slack. She only did what she thought was best.” He sat down on the bed next to me. “Look, I know you’re mad. I was wrong for holding on to this information for so long. I’ve never been afraid of anything, but I was afraid to tell you who I was. I was afraid that you would reject me. I was afraid you wouldn’t believe me. Your reaction proves the man that you are. You didn’t fight me, but you let me explain my side. I don’t know if you completely understand my reasoning but thank you for listening. I am tremendously proud to be your father.”
“So, you didn’t walk away from me. You didn’t think that fatherhood was too much for you to handle?”
“No, if I would have known about you, El, I would have been there as much as I could have. I would have told Charles thank you for raising you.”
I leaned forward, rested my elbows on my thighs and placed my face in my hands. This was a lot of information all at once.
“You should call your mother and talk to her about this. Meantime, we won’t share this information with anyone. They may try to split us up.”
I called my mother the next day, and she confirmed that Reggie was my father. She cried and asked me to forgive her for not telling me about him. Anger was something I couldn’t afford to hold on to in jail. Reggie told me it was important to forgive people you love quickly because love covers a multitude of wrongs.
Samuel
~2008~
Stevie Wonder’sI wishwas pumping loud from the speakers in the kitchen. I could smell fried chicken, macaroni and cheese and collard green aromas mixed with the smoke from the barbecue grill.
My mother and sister were in the kitchen preparing for my welcome home party. I had recently graduated from law school in Chicago and passed my bar exam on the first try.
Reggie and I bonded in secret. We never told anyone he was my father. I thought it would take me a long time to get used to him being my Dad, but in all honesty, I was honored to be his son. Reggie carried himself like a free man. Everyone in the jail esteemed him, not out of fear but out of respect. I met my younger brother, Roc while I was locked up. I’d seen him visit Reggie with a man, but I didn’t know who he was. Reggie introduced us during one of his visits. We started writing each other and formed a tight friendship.
Reggie gave my mother enough money (through one of his contact on the outside) for her to hire an attorney to help get me out of jail. He recommended Louis Flowers. Mr. Flowers hired a private detective to look into the case. The private detective discovered the police detectives did a less than stellar job at the crime scene. They messed up so much of the evidence that a lot of it could have been used to prove my innocence. What they did provide wouldn’t have held up in court except I had an overworked, underpaid public defender who was ready to get my case file off her desk. All she saw was the color of my skin and decided she was not going to work hard at proving my innocence.
With the DNA evidence the public defender never opened, to the testimony of an eyewitness who was never questioned, I was acquitted of all charges after spending four years of my life behind bars.
Mr. Flowers sued the state, and I was awarded a six-figure settlement. I was awarded a full scholarship to finish my undergrad studies through graduate school, and my criminal record was expunged. Mr. Flowers took me under his wing and mentored me through Law school. I was offered a position at his law firm, and I accepted.
“What up El!”
“What’s up Roc!”