“No!”
“Yes.” Andi brings the crushed cake to her mouth and takes a small bite. “And he ate the batter raw. He was so freakin’ funny. You ever got stoned with him before, Oz? He’s hilarious.”
“Dee!”
“No.” Oz’s narrowed eyes study me closely. Not his wife’s cousin as she eats a pot brownie right in front of him, but me; my bad leg, mygoodleg, my crutches. “I’ll unlock you in five minutes, Rook, but first you gotta give me an update. X told me you were with the surgeon yesterday, but he didn’t tell me what’s up. So you do it; what’s happening?”
“No, not five minutes. Now! Because my recovery is none of your damn business.” I thrust my hand forward and tug Andi’s arm up. “Undo these, please. Then I want you all to get out. Tink!” I reach forward and snatch the cell from her hand. Turning it around, I catch sight of my floor, and in the top left corner of the screen, little red letters and numbers. LIVE 01:23. “Are you fucking serious right now? You’re filming this?”
She shrugs. “Jimmy couldn’t leave the gym, so he told me to hook him up.”
“No!” I hit the power button and switch the screen off. Marc Macchio –Friend? Foe? I’m not sure– stands at the door with a dirty grin on his face and his arms folded across his chest. “Get out of my room! All of you, get the hell out! I didn’t invite you in here.”
“But you need me, don’t you, Rook?” Oz dangles a set of keys from his finger and smirks. “We can do this the hard way, or we can do it the easy way.”
“Or I can get the axe,” Marc offers. “I can go all Jack Dawson and get you out. But you run the risk of losing your arm, too. How attached are you?”
“Fuck off!” I snatch the remaining brownie from Dee’s hand to stop her from nibbling, and toss it over top of my visitors. Crumbs fly everywhere, the girls squeal and duck, but Marc doesn’t move a single muscle as the chocolatey snack lands in the hall. Nacho’s toenailsclip-clip-clipon the wooden floor and threaten a stoned pig and an expensive vet visit, but Marc’s stomping foot scares her away on a squeal and panicked feet.
I point when they all turn back to me. “You people need to get out of my home before I press charges.”
“Oh, please.” Rolling her eyes, Tink straightens up and fixes the baby blanket that shifted when Meg ducked. “You’re not doing shit, because you’re still kinda turned on about the night in cuffs. You think Andi’s not right there giving me the hand signals?”
I turn with wide eyes and glare at a snickering Andi. “The fuck? You’re supposed to be on my side!”
“What? I am!” She throws her hand up. “I’m okay with this. I can stay cuffed to you forever, because you’re cute as hell when you’re trying to pee in the middle of the night. So whatever.” She lifts her left hand and shows off the fake ring. “Guys, did you hear we’re getting married? You can all be my bridesmaids.”
“What?!”