4
Andi
Touchstone
Iset my silverware down at eight and pat my bloated belly. Spaghetti sauce stains my plate, and carbs fatten my stomach until I lounge back and groan. Despite my plans to grab lunch several hours ago, this homecooked meal is the first I’ve eaten all day, and it wasn’t until I got here that I realized how shaky I’d become from low blood sugar.
“That was so good, Benny.” Leaning to my left, I rest against his broad shoulder and sigh. “Best meal I’ve had all week.”
He scoffs and throws his arm over my shoulder. “I believe that. You can hardly cook.”
“Lucky I have you to take care of me then, huh?” I glance across the table and smile at Livi sharing her bowl of salad with Nacho. The pig snorts and burrows into Livi’s lap, accepting small pieces of carrot, and holding my niece’s attention the whole time I’ve been here.
“What did you do this afternoon, Andi?” Oz lifts the single beer he’s been nursing since I arrived. Sitting back at the head of the table, with Lindsi on his left, and Livi on his right, he’s the king of the world surrounded by his girls. Everything is falling apart outside this house – with Riley in the hospital, Jess grieving, and his unnecessary worry for Alex – but inside this house, Oz’s life has never been more perfect. It’s actually kind of sad that it’s all fallen down so soon after their wedding; this should be a happy time for them, but work intrudes. “You were gone all day. Kept busy?”
“I was just running errands. Saw a couple girlfriends.” I scratch the back of Ben’s neck and smile when he snuggles in. “Bought some groceries and a litter box for Nacho.”
Oz’s lips twitch as he turns to his little girl and watches her play. “Nacho… I mean, I really shouldn’t be surprised by the shit you do anymore. But a pig? What was going on in your head?”
“She needed a home,” I answer defensively. “She was on death row and only had a few days left until… well…”
He grins. “Bacon?”
“No! She’s too little for that. But still, it wouldn’t have ended well. I was looking for a companion, found her, and fell in love. I don’t get why you’re all hating on her.”
“Not hating.” Smiling, he sits back and lifts his hands. “I mean, I’m not exactly psyched about having farm animals in my house, but we’ve already got Ben, so that’s basically the same thing.”
“Shut up, Pig.” Ben hardly reacts to his step-father’s teasing nowadays. It’s more of a robotic reply, something only practice and familiarity could provide for them. Ben sits back at the table with one ankle resting on his knee and his arm around me like he’s a grown ass man and thinks he’s hot shit, and all the while, he smarts off at a cop and gives zero fucks about respecting the boys in blue.
And I don’t stop him, because I need a hug more than I needed a meal, so I pretend his over protective hugging is a nuisance, and when he’s not paying attention, I snuggle in nice and tight and breathe a sigh of relief.
“I brought your things in from the car when we got home.” Lindsi gestures toward the hall. “Dumped them on the guest bed.”
“Thanks. I’ll rent a car tomorrow, too. I really should have done that today while at the airport. I wasn’t really thinking.”
“Understandable.” Lindsi watches me with sympathetic eyes. “How are you after today? I’m sorry we didn’t tell you about his leg before you went in. I didn’t know how to say it, and before I got a chance, you ran in and figured it out for yourself.”
I was sipping my glass of wine, washing down the excess carbs and considering what Benny might’ve made for dessert, but now I chug until my glass is empty. I’m sick of being asked if I’m okay. I’m sick of the pitying eyes and sympathetic pats like it’s me stuck in a hospital right now with a missing limb. “I can’t believe this has happened, guys. I think I’m legitimately in shock, and I bet he is, too.” I set my wine glass down with a snap. “I’m just so angry, because Riley never expected this, and I know he doesn’t want it. Nobody asked what he wanted, and even if I know it had to happen, even if I know amputation was the only choice, it doesn’t make it easier to swallow. Now, he has to live with a choice he never made, all because he was being someone else’s hero.”
“We were trying to save his life.” Oz sits forward seriously. “We had to make a choice, Andi, and the options we were given sucked. We chose the one that would let him live.”
“I know, and if I was here, I would have come to the same conclusion in the end. But that still doesn’t make it better. He’s so angry! If he was okay with it, if he was willing to embrace it, then it would be fine. But he’s not. He’s furious, and he’s not accepting this without a fight.” I shake my head and sigh. “Missing a leg is better than dead. I know that.Youknow that. But I’m not sure he knows it yet, and no matter how many of us tell him it’ll be okay, that doesn’t make it easier for him.”
“He has a long road to recovery,” Oz murmurs. “He’s going to need time, but he’ll be up and running again soon. You know he will. If anyone can bounce back, it’s him.”
“He’s not going to accept desk duty.” Our eyes meet. “He won’t be okay with typing reports all day.”
Oz scoffs. “You think I don’t already know that? He already told us he’s out.”
“Out?” My heart races. “Out of what?”
“The force! Told us he quits, wants nothing to do with us. Said he doesn’t want help, doesn’t want medical leave, doesn’t want a damn pension. He quit and told Alex to take a leaping shit off a cliff.”
“What?” I almost knock my wine glass to the floor when I surge forward. “You can’t do that! What about insurance? He can’t leave!”
“I didn’t do shit.Hedid! You’re not the only person he wants gone outta his life, Andi. He constantly has me and X escorted outta his room. He doesn’t want us, he doesn’t want anybody.”
“Oz! Medical will bankrupt him!”