“He didn’t even remember me,” I mumble, shame heating my cheeks.
One night of fun is no big deal, but being forgotten is a certain kind of hell I’ve never felt before. I didn’t feel used that night. I was as active a participant as he was. I didn’t even feel ashamed when he called mebabethe next morning, making it abundantly clear he didn’t know my name.
Being forgotten completely? That’s a knife to the chest.
“Did you even tell him your name?”
I shake my head. “Not my name. Me. He didn’t even remember we were together.”
Faith’s eyes dart away, and I know that’s her tell, the way she acts when she knows more but doesn’t want to say anything.
“What?”
She shakes her head.
“What, Faith?”
She seems a little sad when she looks back at me, and a layer of trepidation coats my already wounded spirit.
“I overheard some of them giving Spade a hard time, but I didn’t know it was about you.”
Dread swims in my stomach. “What were they saying?”
“It isn’t important.”
“Tell me.”
She shrugs, giving me a weak smile that doesn’t reach her eyes. “I heard one of the guys giving him a hard time for striking out. I didn’t think you’d turn him down if he hit on you, so I stopped listening because it didn’t really concern me.”
It’s my turn to look away. How fucking humiliating.
“The Cerberus guys are gossiping about me?”
“The conversation was between Aro, Ugly, and Spade.”
“What about Boomer?”
“Boomer doesn’t get in the middle of stuff like that. I hardly see him around the clubhouse, and when I do, he doesn’t get involved in conversations like that unless it’s to voice his opinion when one of the other guys is taking things a little too far for his liking.”
“Boomer seems like a good guy,” I say absently, reeling from the fact that grown-ass men are gossiping like cackling old hens.
“They’re all good guys,” Faith says. “But before you snap back at me about Spade, it’s incredibly shitty that he doesn’t remember you.”
I swallow thickly, more upset that I’m letting his lack of memory bother me than anything else. I’m a confident woman. I had an incredible night with him. It was what I wanted. I didn’t see it as an opportunity to get something started with the man, although until I realized he didn’t remember me, I might have revisited that night with him on more than one occasion. But that’s about great sex, not about seeing myself as a permanent fixture at the Cerberus clubhouse.
“So does that mean you won’t be attending the wedding?”
Confused, I look to my best friend, wondering just how out of touch with things I’ve been recently because I don’t even recall her telling me that Legend asked her to tie the knot.
I look down at her finger, and my friend chuckles. “Not mine. Landon and Rick’s wedding. It’s planned for during their Christmas break from school.”
My first instinct is to shake my head no. I have no doubt the embarrassment I’m feeling over what happened at the Veterans’ event will still be lingering next month. Showing my face at Cerberus seems like the worst idea ever.
“Will Aro and Ugly be there?”
“I imagine so,” she says, but her eyes narrow. “What are you thinking?”
I shrug.