“Boy toy?” Holden repeated, but we ignored him.
“You know, this is the kind of thing that always drove me crazy when we were married. You’re so damn stubborn,” she said.
“And you’re self-involved.”
“Just stop it!”
Ryan’s outburst drew all of our eyes to him.
“God I’m so sick of this.” Ryan closed his eyes as his body looked rigid.
A moment of tense silence filled the room.
Amy and I looked at each other. Something significant passed between us, an understanding of how we’d both messed up this whole parenting thing, and she gave me a slight nod.
“You’re right,” I told Ryan. “We’re sorry.”
“Yeah,” Amy chimed in. “I know we haven’t been much of a team since the divorce, but we’ll do better, I promise.”
Reaching across the table, she took a hold of Ryan’s hand while I patted his shoulder.
“I’m sorry I freaked out,” Ryan said, “I had to—”
“Don’t worry about it,” I interrupted. “Do me a favor and give your mom and me a couple of minutes together, okay?”
“Sure.” Ryan got up from the table while Amy whispered something into Holden’s ear.
He left too.
When it was just the two of us left in the room, I leaned back in my chair and let out a sigh. “We suck at this parenting thing, huh?” I asked.
Amy chuckled. “The co-parenting part. Yeah, we suck at that.”
“Let’s make a change,” I suggested. This would be so difficult for me. I’d held on to my anger toward this woman for so long, I wasn’t sure it was possible to let it go. But I had to give it a shot. For Ryan.
“A clean slate?” she asked.
“We can try.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Holden moving in. I knew I should have, but you’re not always easy to talk to.”
“Yeah, sorry about that.”
There was a pregnant pause.
“I’m sorry for cheating on you,” she stated sadly. “I know that it was shitty. I should’ve had the guts to end things between us the right way.”
“Things were pretty bad by the end, weren’t they?” I knew we had marital problems, but I’d always clung to the idea that she’d ruined the marriage by cheating, that she was the bad guy. But if I were honest myself, I knew I wasn’t the best husband to her. We’d gotten married too young and before we were in love. That kind of thing was rough to come back from. I knew she’d resented me and I had a problem with my temper.
We just weren’t meant to be.
“But it was all worth it for Ryan.”
“Finally, something we can agree on.” Amy nodded.