“I’m not sure they were,” I say, biting my lip as I try to figure out how to tuck the beetle’s body under the wings without messing up the antennae. “And yeah, I can teach you. Just give me a second to see if I remember how to finish the last part.”
“You know I’m a big fan of arts and crafts at any time of the day,” Evie says, “but I’m going to need you to circle back around to the fibbing and what’s going on with Brain Chill.” She leans down, her curly blonde head hovering by my hands as she peers up at me with worried green eyes. “Are you okay? They didn’t fire you, did they? Because if they did, I think you should sue. They were working you way too hard. It had to have been illegal. Or at the very least immoral, and in a civil case, people might actually care about that.”
“Agreed,” Harlow says. “And one of the guys in my new study group has a brother who’s an employment attorney. He’s the guy who helped those women who were being treated like slave labor by their families in Queens get fair pay and back wages. He’s supposed to be really good, and I’ll help pay his retainer. I have a bunch of money saved from tutoring and those fuckers need to be taught a lesson.”
“Yeah, me, too,” Evie says. “I’ll chip in, too. I’m so pissed at those assholes.”
I glance up from the napkin, my chest tight with gratitude. “Have I told you lately that I love you? Like, a lot?”
Evie grins. “No, but of course you do. We’re amazing.”
“Though not as amazing as that guy you were making out with last night,” Harlow says, making my stomach cramp around my coffee.
Evie’s jaw drops. “What? What guy?”
“You were FaceTiming with Ian when it happened,” Harlow says. “But I saw it all. Our birthday girl was over in a dark corner chatting intently with that mysterious stranger in leather. And then she kissed him with loads of tongue.”
“It wasn’t loads of tongue,” I protest, crossing my arms over my churning stomach. “It was a perfectly normal amount of tongue. And he wasn’t a stranger.”
Harlow’s brows lift. “Oh, no? So now you have a secret boyfriend in addition to lying about your job? Who are you? And what have you done with Jess?”
I roll my eyes. “He isn’t my boyfriend. He’s…Sam.Sam,” I repeat when they both respond with blank looks. “From high school?”
Evie’s expression blooms with recognition, followed swiftly by shock. “What?Thatwas Sam? Oh my God, talk about a glow-up. Holy shit, Jess, he is freaking hot!”
I wrinkle my nose and toss my mostly finished beetle at her chest. “Ew, stop. He is not.”
“Then why did you kiss him?” Harlow presses. “You already confessed you weren’t drunk, so that can’t be it. Was he blackmailing you? Refusing to give you the vintage nerd game he brought as a gift unless you massaged his tonsils with your tongue?”
“It’s the bargain, isn’t it,” Evie whispers, her eyes practically ablaze with excitement as she crouches in the chair opposite Harlow’s. “The one you told me about that one time. The one from when you guys were the only virgins at coding camp. And he remembered, and that’s why he was at your twenty-fourth birthday! Because he’s ready to go for it for real!”
“Okay, stop. Seriously.” Harlow’s lips push into a pout. “I’m legit upset now. Not even kidding. What is this bargain? And why didn’t you tell me about it? Have I been demoted to second-tier friend, Jessica? Is that what’s happening here? If so, I refuse to stand for it. I am first-tier friend material, and I can prove it. From now on, we’re having breakfast together on Monday mornings. I’ll go get food from that giant donut place you like and bring it back to you so you can gorge on sugar in your pajamas before you disappear into computer world for the week.”
“I won’t be disappearing into computer world,” I say, deciding it’s best to come clean about everything all at once. Otherwise, I’ll be trapped here for hours, and I need to get down to the laundry room and start a load before ten, or the machines will all be full, and I’ll have nothing clean to wear to meet my new cat. Or Sam.
I tell myself I’m more concerned about the cat and didn’t lie awake half the night wondering what a person wears to a “getting to know you again so we can bang and go our separate ways” date and spill my guts to the girls. I explain about my explosive last day in the office, my completely lame severance package, and my certainty that my mother is going to try to hogtie me and drag me to medical school. “Once she’s done weeping softly in her room in embarrassment, of course,” I finish with a sigh and a gulp of coffee.
“Oh, babe,” Evie says. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be,” I say with a shake of my head. “I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me. Especially since there’s no need to be upset. Sam already offered me another job. He works for Paradisus.”
“You’re kidding,” Harlow says, sucking in an excited breath. “They’re that giant tech company with the heart or gold,” she tells Evie. “The one that designed Best Nest.”
“I know,” Evie says, with a roll of her eyes. “I may be tech averse, but even I’ve heard of Paradisus. They’re supposed to be an incredible company to work for.”
“They are,” I confirm. “One of the top ten worldwide. They’re opening a new game design division and want to hire me to lead a team. I’m going to interview with the people heading up the project sometime this week. If I decide to take it, I’ll be making way more money, have tons of bennies, and be able to move to London if I decide I’m tired of working remotely and want to join the rest of the people in the office.”
Harlow’s lips turn down at the edges. “Oh. Wow. That’s…great.”
I frown. “Then why do you sound like I just told you my vintage clothing collection was incinerated in a fire?”
She winces. “I know. I’m sorry. I’m also too hungover to hide my emotions. I’ll just miss you, is all. It’s totally selfish and I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry, too,” Evie says. “Because I feel the same way. I’m so happy for you, of course, but I’ll miss you so much if you move to London. We’ve never been that far apart.” She draws her knees tighter to her chest as she adds, “And my inner romantic really wanted you and Sam to make good on your bargain, realize you’re perfect for each other, and fall madly in love.”
I stick out my tongue, gagging silently. “Gross.”
“It’s not gross!” she maintains. “It would be like a rom-com movie come to life.” She turns to Harlow. “They made a bargain when they were seventeen, and the only people not getting laid at coding camp. They decided if they were both still virgins on their twenty-fourth birthdays, they’d meet up and…help each other out.”