He winces and nods. “All right, that’s fair.”
I step forward. I curl my hands into fists, heart racing, and look him in the eye.
“Did Ansell know you were following William? Did he know you sent those emails?”
“No,” he says softly, shaking his head. “I swear, Marie, Ansell had no clue.”
I let that sink in. I close my eyes and take a couple deep breaths, trying to steady myself, but I feel like such a fool.
I should’ve listened when he said he had nothing to do with it. We could’ve worked this out together, and instead I added needless steps and worthless pain to the whole process. Worst of all, I don’t know if Ansel will even see me again, not after the way I treated him.
I wouldn’t blame him if he told me to get lost.
“I believe you,” I say, opening my eyes again. “I overheard Magnus talking to my father this morning. He mentioned you have a grudge against him and his family.”
Baptist laughs softly and starts to walk. I fall in beside him, and we follow along the perimeter for the prison together. He tells me the story of his father and the theater, and as he finishes, I can completely understand why he did what he did.
“I tried to keep Ansell from getting involved with you. That was never meant to be part of it. All I wanted to do was show you that William is a cheating asshole so you could walk away from that nightmare of a family and not get wrapped up in their bullshit.”
“You didn’t see the whole Bella Baby articles coming then, did you?”
He grins, shaking his head. “Not at all, but I’ll admit, I loved it.”
“I’m sure you did. It embarrassed the hell out of the Crawfords.”
“Made them look like idiots.”
“William’s never going to fully recover.”
He sighs and puts a hand over his heart. “I hope you’re right.”
I smile slightly and shade my eyes as we come around the corner and start toward the other side. The walls loom, big and stone, and sweat rolls down my back. I have a hundred other questions to ask him, about the theaters and his family and the Crawfords, but only one thing is important to me right now.
“How angry is Ansell?”
He chews on that for a moment. My heart’s a stuttering wreck. I’m terrified that I screwed everything up already and Ansell’s going to refuse to see me. If that happens, I can’t blame him—I wouldn’t want to see me, either. Not after what happened.
“He’s hurt,” Baptist says, which is actually worse. “I didn’t know he could be hurt, but he is.”
“Shit,” I whisper, staring down at the ground. “I really messed up.”
“Look, you made an honest mistake. You assumed that nothing happens around Ansell without him knowing, and normally, you’d be right. But he and I have a sort of agreement going, or at least we used to. It was a code of silence of sorts. We both have our secrets and we don’t ask about them, and that way we get along just fine.”
“The Crawfords and your email, were they your secrets? Or did Ansell know you had a grudge against that family?”
Baptist sighs and shakes his head. “He knew I didn’t like them, but he didn’t know why and how much. We talked about it yesterday and we’re all good now, but you should’ve seen him. I didn’t know he could get so angry.”
“Shit, I’m sorry. This is all my fault.”
“It’s really not.” He peers a me sideways. “You’ve really been fucked over through this whole thing, you know that? From the very start, it’s like everyone’s done their best to really screw you hard.”
I smile a bit. “Feels that way.”
“Seriously. From William on down. You didn’t do yourself any favors going with the nuclear option when you sent those emails to Baby, but still. Everyone’s acting like you’re this monster causing all this drama, when really the real assholes here are William and his father. You did nothing but tell the truth.”
“They don’t see it that way.”
“No, they wouldn’t. But I do and Ansell does.”
I chew my lip and let it sink in. I have to admit, it feels good to hear. I’ve felt like I’m toxic lately, like I’m leaking radioactive materials and everyone around me is getting sick and dying because I’m so poisonous. If it’s not me, but it’s the people that want to hurt me, then maybe I really can have a future—if Ansell is willing to forgive my stupidity.
I stop walking and face the prison. Baptist stands a few feet away, watching me. I stare up at the very top and let out a long breath, shaking my head, letting my hair sway back and forth against my shoulders.
“Be honest with me. What should I do here?”