“I don’t regret talking to his ex,” I tell my friend firmly. “And I’m not going to feel sorry for him, either.”
“I don’t think he would want you to feel sorry for him,” Sadie says slowly. “I think he just wants to forget it.”
Maybe he does. But I can’t. Talking to Blair and Sienna had given me more of an insight into the person I was being forced to marry, more than Killian ever had. And the way he’d handled this pissed me off. Even if I was meddling, like he’d said, that didn’t mean he could just do whatever he wanted.
I debate telling Sadie about what had just happened at his house, unsure of how she’d take it. She rises before I can make a decision, heading towards the kitchen.
“Do you want a drink?” she asks over her shoulder.
“Do you have something strong enough to make me forget today?” I call back.
She reappears with a bottle of vodka in her hand and two shot glasses. “Seems like you might need this.”
I don’t even question the fact that we’re drinking at three in the afternoon. I need it. Maybe the alcohol will erase the feeling of his skin against mine. Of his lips pressed to my throat in a way that consumed me. I shake off the memories, taking the bottle from her and pouring the shots. We huddle on the floor around the coffee table.
“Should I call Kimmy? I think she’s free today.” Sadie reaches for her phone.
“Yeah, tell her to get her ass over here. Let’s make it a girl’s night in.” That’s exactly what I need. To let loose in Sadie’s apartment without having to worry about any men at all.
Sadie’s glass clinks against mine before we down the shots, and I pick up the bottle to pour another. By the time Kimmy arrives, we’re halfway through the bottle. Kimmy waltzes in as soon as Sadie wobbles over to open the door for her.
Eyeing the vodka, Kimmy flops down beside me, leaning back against the couch. “Pass me a glass. Looks like I have some catching up to do.”
I do as I’m told, passing over another shot glass Sadie had gotten from the kitchen. Kimmy tips it back before pouring herself another.
“So,” she says mildly, “Sadie told me you went over to Killian’s house?”
I groan. “I really don’t want to talk about him right now.” But even just the sound of his name sparks heat in the pit of my stomach. Or maybe that’s the alcohol.
“Oh, come on. What was it like? Clean? Dirty? Tell us everything.” Kimmy leans closer, a mischievous smile on her face. “Did something happen?”
Sadie snorts, swinging her legs over the arms of the wicker chair. “Yeah, she pissed him off. So if you’re looking for sexy details, I don’t think you’re going to get them.”
My tongue feels too light in my mouth. “Actually, something did happen.”
My friends straighten. Sadie nearly falls to the floor. “Wait,” Kimmy cuts her off before she can say anything, “what happened? Spill.”
“We kissed.” I shrug, trying not to make it seem like a bigger deal than it was.
“Just kissed?” Kimmy looks disappointed.
“Maybe a bit more than that….”
“Oh my God. If you don’t tell me right now, I’m going to smack you.”
I hug myself, trying to hold back the feelings I’d tried to drink away. “He challenged me when I told him I wouldn’t back off. Told me he could make me scream without—” I stop. They don’t know that I’d made him promise not to have sex with me before the wedding. “Without actually having sex.”
“And?” Sadie prods. “Did he?”
Heat flares across my cheeks, and my friends squeal.
“No,” I say quickly, trying to shut them up. “He didn’t.”
“But was he good?” Kimmy pokes me in the side, making me giggle.
“Maybe.”
“Thank God for that,” Kimmy mutters, pouring me another shot. “Because you do not want to marry a man who’s bad in bed. Your marriage would fucking suck.”