OCTAVIA
Itremble in Linc’s arms as the pool of blood spreads on the basement floor.
What the fuck just happened?
Is this it? Is this the moment I break? How the fuck is one person supposed to survive all of this and come out of it in one piece? I might’ve been ready to kill him to survive, but watching him die like that…
“Octavia,” Lincoln murmurs in my ear, while he holds me tight enough to keep me tethered to reality. “We should get you out of here. You need a doctor.”
I can’t say anything—do anything—but stare at Panda’s pale body on the ground. Finn moves toward me, but Maverick just watches me from a distance, not able to meet my gaze.
Finn puts a finger under my chin, taking my focus from the blood so that I’m looking him in the eye. His jaw ticks as he looks me over, spotting the bruising around my wrists, but in a blink it’s gone and he looks at me like I’m the most precious thing in the world. “Hey, pretty girl. We’ve got you, but we need to get you out of here and to a hospital.”
I nod, but look back over his shoulder at Maverick who still won’t look at me. “Mav?”
“He’ll be okay, V. Just let us look after you before you worry about us, okay?” Finn's voice is low and soothing. He could almost convince me everything is going to be okay, but nothing about any of this is okay. “We’ll sort this out. Just go with Lincoln, pretty girl.”
He strokes his thumb down my cheek as a sob rips from me. Should I cry for the man who stalked and kidnapped me? Probably not, but P was more than that. He deserved better than this.
“He wasn’t working alone,” I croak as tears run down my face. My mind is running at a million miles a minute with everything. There are so many things I want to ask them that I can’t focus properly, so it takes me a second to realize that East isn’t here. “Where is East?”
Finn’s face barely moves, but his jaw twitches, and I know that something is wrong.
Lincoln turns me in his arms to face him, a murderous calm about him, though I’m pretty sure it’s not directed at me right now. “Just come with me, Octavia. Let's get you checked out, and then I’ll tell you everything.”
I shake my head, ignoring the pain as Lincoln uses one of the spare bandages to wrap my ribs. I don’t think he slashed deep enough to do any major damage, it just hurts like a fucker. I wipe the tears from my face as my heart races at the memory of the night I was taken. That image is all I can see. “Where is East?”
“I’ll take you to him. Come on.” Lincoln's words don’t set me at ease, not even a little, but I let him lead me up the stairs and out of the run-down house. It’s dark outside, the moon is high in the sky, and I shiver as the cool night air hits me and my sock-covered feet hit the cold ground.
Lincoln curses and opens the back door of the Cayenne. He reappears and pulls his hoodie over my head, which is much better than the now-bloody tank top. My leggings might not be in the best condition, but they are at least warm. He rubs his hands up and down my arms before opening the passenger door and bundling me into the car. Pulling my seatbelt over me, he buckles me in, all without a word.
I open my mouth to say thank you, but the lump in my throat makes it too hard to speak. Trying to process everything is proving too much for right now, so I wipe my mind and focus on getting warm, on the smell of Lincoln on his hoodie, on the soft, supple seat beneath me.
Anything to keep my emotions at bay, because if I let myself feel everything right now, I’m not sure how long it’ll take to get myself back from that tsunami.
Lincoln climbs into the car and starts the engine, turning the heaters up to max before pulling away from the house. I have no idea where we are. The house is in the middle of nowhere and there’s nothing but flat, open space as far as the eye can see.
“How hurt are you?”
I shrug. “I’m okay,” I say, playing down the pain because I know we’re already on our way to the hospital. I just need to keep myself conscious until then.
“How did you find me?” I ask, my mind wandering to P and how he even found this place.
His hands clench on the steering wheel, his entire body taut, shoulders stiff as he speeds down the dirt road. “We asked the Conclave for help.”
A shiver runs down my spine at his words.
No.
What had they traded for help to find me?
Guilt slams through me at what finding me must have cost them.
“I’m sorry,” I choke out. He slams on the brakes and I fly forward, only held in place by the belt he put around me, the sharp pain in my ribs causing my vision to swim.
He turns to look at me, his gray eyes a full thunderstorm. “You don’t apologize. Not for anything. None of this is your fault. Do you understand me, Octavia?” A tear slips down my cheek, and he reaches over, wiping it away with his thumb. “There isn’t anything in this world any of us wouldn’t give for you. We did what was needed, and I’d do it a thousand times over.”
I nod at his words, unable to say anything at the angry passion radiating from him. He nods once in return and puts his hand back on the steering wheel, moving us forward again. I pull my knees up to my chest, clinging to them as I make myself smaller in the silence, even though it hurts. It’s nothing compared to what I’ve felt the last however long I was with Panda.