“But even your coward father couldn’t stand the sight of you, could he? Did you enjoy finding his cold dead body? His note to you telling you how you weren’t enough to make him stay in this world? You’ll never be good enough, Octavia Royal. Not for him, not for this school, not for any of it.”
Rage pulses through my veins, but I refuse to cry in front of these assholes. I hate how he’s airing out shit that I didn’t think anyone in the general population knew about. Things like the note from my dad, or the fact that I’m the one who found him. We kept all of that from the press. I stand, trying to compose myself, but all of the eyes crawling over me, looking for cracks in my armor, make me want to vomit. I shove it all back, trying to piece myself back together while he just smiles that dead smile of his back at me.
“You are nothing, Octavia, and while you might like to pretend you’re more, you never will be. The longer you resist, the more it’s going to hurt. You made yourself free game by coming back here. It won’t ever stop, not until you leave.”
Maverick steps toward me, leaning forward and sniffing before pulling a face. “I guess they forgot to take the trash out.”
He turns and leaves with the other two close on his heels, but everyone else simply watches as I stand here trying to piece my armor back together.
“Fuck this.” I leave the room, determined not to let them get to me, but fearing it might be a losing battle.
* * *
The morning passes in a blur, but for the most part, I’m left alone after Business. Mostly because the guys, Blair, and her friends aren’t in my Music or Statistics classes. That doesn’t mean that more of the same bullshit whispers and taunts haven’t followed me, though. I always thought I had a thick skin, but apparently something about being back in Echoes Cove has me feeling a bit more sensitive. It’s only been half a day, and I’m already exhausted by it all. The whispers, the structure, the classes. Thankfully my Music and Stats teachers were better than Mr. Peters, and the classes were engaging enough to hold my partial attention. I’m used to chaos breaks between my lessons, so four in a row has my brain all kinds of numb. I’m seriously starting to question if a 4.0 GPA is actually doable. I might need to hire a tutor if I want to meet the terms of the will because I can’t seem to get my brain to play ball.
After I leave Statistics, I head to the cafeteria, which of course is on the other side of the freaking building. At least the walk gives me a chance to decompress a little, as I try to shove down the rising panic about passing my classes along with surviving this cesspit of a school for the rest of the year.
I spot Indi waiting for me at the doors, and my anxiety goes down by about three levels. I might be Stone Royal’s daughter, used to paparazzi and crazy fangirls, but I’m still a seventeen-year-old girl on her first day at a new high school. This is a whole different ball game. Knowing that Blair and her bitch squad will be behind those doors makes me want to grab lunch off campus.
“Hey! Rough morning?” she asks as I approach, and my mood lightens with each step. There’s something about her that’s just all sunshine and rainbows. Even with the whole alt/emo thing she apparently has going on at heart.
“My morning has been filled with Blair and her vapid bitch squad as well as a delightful run in with Lincoln and his merry band of jerks, so yeah, you could say that.” I groan, and she tucks her arm through mine.
“Oh no, not the Saint Squad.” She sighs dramatically, and I can’t help but laugh. “I don’t know where these assholes get their sense of power from, but they know this is just high school, right?” I let her drag me through the doors, my stomach tightening as I get my first look at the cafeteria. The people are no less cliquey now than they were the last time I was here. The popular kids occupy the rectangular tables near the center of the room, with everyone else taking the space around them.
“You’re not from around here, are you?” I ask, and she shakes her head.
“Nah, I grew up back East, but my dad is a tech genius and landed a job in the Valley, so now I’m here… With all of the California sunshine and vapid assholes I can handle.” She laughs as we walk to the lunch line, and I can’t help but roll my eyes when I see what’s on the menu for the day. At least there are still burgers and pizza. Fuck the salad bar. I don’t do a rabbit food diet. I tried it once, and it was the most miserable and cranky two hours of my life.
“Well, what you’ve probably learned is that the Saints basically own this town. Maverick and Finley have been his best friends since we were all kids. Even when we were younger, everyone just gravitated toward them. I have no idea why. Back then, I was too young to notice it, but I guess the power is something they were born into.” I shrug as we make our way to an empty table by the windows. We pass the jock table and the table filled with Lincoln, Blair, and all of their pseudo-sycophants. “Table in the corner?”
“Sounds perfect, away from all the crazy.”
“There’s a spot here without crazy?” I pull a face of feigned shock, and she laughs as we head toward the table and slide into the empty seats.
“Back to the power system… I’ve noticed it. It’s just really different from the public school I was at before I came here last year. But hey, now you’re here and I’m not the new kid anymore, so thanks for that.” She tips her can of soda toward me, and I laugh.
“You’re welcome, I guess?” I take a bite of the cheese pizza I slapped on my plate and groan at how good it is. I mean, it’s not as good as Denny’s in New York, but for high school cafeteria pizza, it’s the fucking shit. “So you only came here last year?”
“Yeah.” She nods before taking a bite from her burger. She chews thoughtfully before she picks up a fry, points it at me, and continues, “And you better believe my alt loving, purple hair rocking personality wasn’t exactly par for the course around here. I mean, my hair was blue when I started, but I’m pretty sure the change to purple hasn’t made a difference.”
“Dude, I love your hair,” I tell her with a shrug.
“V, you love Midnight Blue, lived life on a tour bus, and love my hair. I knew I was making the right decision having you as my bestie.”
I grin at her because I obviously think she made an awesome decision; and while I might not be here for long, surviving this year with a friend like her will make it much easier. We eat in a comfortable quiet, and I download the social media app for the school onto my phone while Indi scrolls through the reality news on hers, showing me random articles about shit I’ve never heard about. I nod and smile regardless.
I sign in to the app, change my password, then close it down. Social media always seemed a bit icky to me, but if this is how stuff works here, then I’m willing to give it a go. I slide my phone away as I finish eating and look up at Indi. “Want to go catch some sunshine before lunch is over?”
She stands, nodding, and I follow suit. We dump our trays in the trash cans, and I turn in time to walk straight into Blair, her lunch spilling straight down the front of my uniform. “Watch where you’re going, you stupid bitch.”
The way she smiles at me tells me this wasn’t an accident, not that I ever actually thought it was. Granted, the spaghetti making its way down my shirt only serves to confirm how unaccidental this fucking run-in was. This bitch doesn’t eat carbs.
“Here, let me help with that stain.” Brittany cackles before throwing her drink over me, the sticky liquid staining my uniform further. The entire cafeteria is silent until Maverick starts laughing, and then the rest of the students join in. Fury and embarrassment burns in my veins, and it takes every ounce of control that I have to not lay this bitch out.
I clench my fists and remember that Mac taught me never to hit someone first. Finish the fight, but never start it. Even with this crazy bitch.
“Blair, that shit is out of order.” I look up and see some of the football team heading in our direction. I look over to Lincoln who is scowling over at us, but he just sits there, watching it play out and not bothering to intervene. If he’s pissed off, he could’ve stopped Blair himself, but fuck him because we both know he started all of this.