But as much as I hope it doesn’t come to that, I know Steve well enough to know that what I’m doing will hurt him more than anything he’s lived through so far, even more than when May’s mom left when she was still a baby.
It’s stuff I can’t dwell on, though. As much as I dread the day he’ll find out, which will be sooner rather than later at this rate, I still feel my chest exploding every time I think of May.
She’s all I can think about for a new reason.
She’s gonna be mine, no more wondering and what if.
Mine.
And once I claim her, I plan on keeping her mine, forever.
The thought carries me with confidence from the real estate agent all the way to Steve’s mechanic shop.
It’s looking a lot quieter than the last time I saw it, the whole town does.
And after he’s greeted me with more gusto than he did earlier this morning, I ask if his staff are all on a break.
“It’s just me now, Big B. May as well tell ya,” he sighs, wiping his hands dry after scrubbing them in a little sink by his office.
“Things haven’t been as good as they used to,” he reflects, but he quickly changes the subject back to me being here and catching up.
For me, it’s back to May in my own mind.
It’s like I can’t even look him in the eye now, knowing that I had her in my arms only a few minutes ago in his house.
“So, tell me. What’s this damned surprise of yours?” he grins, punching my arm gently. “You know I hate secrets, Brandon.”
All my cheeky suspense, my bravado about moving here as a surprise, and right next door, no less, evaporates when I do manage to look my oldest friend square in the eye.
“I’ll tell you tonight,” I remind him, forcing cheerfulness, but I can see his eyes shift as he studies me.
That suspicious glance I got more than once from him earlier this morning.
“You know, a silent business partner…,” I start to say, drawing my words out and tactfully changing the subject. “…A partner with no say in how you run things, just someone investing in the business,” I continue, noticing his expression shift to a smile as he starts to catch on.
But he shakes his head.
I always figured Steve’s business was growing as fast and as big as my own. Whenever I’ve asked him about it, he said things were never better.
I guess we both have a different idea of what success and doing alright really mean.
But after seeing things for myself and hearing from May and now Steve that things really aren’t so great, no matter how stubborn he is, I could easily help him out with money.
“Okay, okay,” I continue. “How about an old friend just helping out another old friend? I’ll sign a check, you fill out how much you need, and I say ‘Merry Christmas,’” I drawl, figuring if he doesn’t want a business partner, I’ll gift him the money.
“I don’t need your charity if that’s what you’re getting at,” Steve says, clapping my shoulder with his hand. “I appreciate the thought, Big B. But we’re doing alright here, May and me. Things are quiet, but they’ll pick up. They always do.”
Ordinarily, I mean, if I wasn’t falling so hard and fast for his only daughter, I’d let it go.
I’d offer Steve some financial help, and he’d decline, which would be the end of it.
But it’s not that simple anymore.
If Steve’s counting on May to be around forever, paying her way and doing whatever she can to keep them both with their heads just above the water, he’s in for a shock.
Because May’s not gonna have to struggle or worry anymore. I’ll make sure of it.
And whether Steve likes it or not, as much as I know he’s gonna hate my guts when he finds out about May and me, he’s still my best friend.