I closed the door to my room, pressing my back against it. “No, it had nothing to do with Mads, sir.” I kept my tone neutral, the lie easily rolling off my tongue.Deny, deny, deny.
“Then why did Sterling end up in the hospital with a few broken ribs?” he snapped.
“Because he’d an attention-seeking douchebag.” The response slipped out of me before I realized what I was saying.
A harsh laugh came through the other end of the phone. “That douchebag holds the keys to your Chi Sigma alumni.”
“I don’t give a shit about some fucking fraternity.”
“I’ve told you before. Chi Sigma isn’t just a school organization. The connections you’ll make are imperative to not just your future but this family. Perhaps if Madeline Clarke transferred to another university, you would take it more seriously.”
He didn’t come right out and say it, but that had been a threat. He would use his influence and friendship with the Clarkes to do just that—remove her. If my father had his way, he would remove Mads from my life completely. After I graduated and came to work at the family business, he would, a few years down the road, find me a suitable wife, one who would fit the part of a prominent member of the elite society. Love had nothing to do with it, nor what I wanted. It mattered very little to the man who made every decision in his life methodically.
“You can mess with my life, but I swear to God, if you even think about meddling in Mads’s, you’ll regret it.” The words came out low and bitter. I meant every one of them. I would stand in his way if he tried to impose on her life.
“Then stop thinking with your dick. There are plenty of girls.”
He would know all about that. I don’t think there had ever been a day in his life when he’d been faithful and honest with my mother.Fuck that. Fuck him.“As I said, she has nothing to do with this,” I reiterated between clenched teeth.
Thick-ass tension oozed through the phone, wrapping around my neck and choking me. I had made a mistake, showing my father how important Mads was to me. He had my weakness now, and he would use it any time I strayed off the path he laid out for me.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuckity fuck.
“Don’t screw this up,” he stated. “Find a way to make it right. I don’t give a shit how much you hate Sterling. In business, making friends isn’t a priority. Sealing the deal. That’s what matters.”
“I get it. Message received,Pops.”
“Micah, I don’t have to tell you what will happen if I receive another call.”
I rubbed my temples, a dull ache pulsing behind my eyes. My room was dark, the blinds drawn closed and the lights off. I was grateful for the darkness. “No, sir, you don’t, but if you involve her at all in this, you won’t have an heir to inherit your kingdom.”
“Remember that when you don’t have a dime to your name.” The phone went silent on the other end before the line clicked dead.
I smashed my fist into the door behind me, but it could have easily been my phone going across the room. I definitely wanted to throw shit, and before I destroyed my phone for the second time in less than twelve hours, I flung it onto my bed. Opening the side drawer of my nightstand, I took out a bottle of pills, dumped a few in my mouth, and tossed them back.
The headache that had been edging just above my temples was moving quickly into a migraine. As I sat down on the side of the bed, two things became painfully clear. Not only was Sterling using Mads but now so would my father.
I refused to let that happen.
No matter what the cost, I would stop him. Damn my soul to whatever Hell awaited so long as she remained protected.
She was in more danger than before, caught in the crossfires between this ongoing war with my father and now this budding feud with Sterling.
And secondly, I couldn’t help but think that maybe the only way to keep Mads safe was for her to stay far away from me. I knew what I should do, but knowing wasn’t the same as going through the motions. I so desperately wanted to cling to what we’d been building over the last few months, but this was precisely why I hadn’t let myself say what my heart already knew, because speaking such strong emotions out loud gave them power.
It would hurt her, break her, something I vowed never to do.
She wouldn’t be the only one broken.
Stepping away from Mads would be the hardest thing I’d ever do. I didn’t know if I had the strength to totally push her out of my life. I was positive I couldn’t do that. Selfish? Probably.
I refused to leave her unprotected.
But for a little while, just until I took care of Sterling and got my father to believe it was over. I had to undo the damage I’d created.
Fuck!
The curse screamed inside my head, and I longed to release it into the world, to belt it from the top of my lungs, rattling the walls of this room. Fury and pain, my two old friends.