“You are all right, Jarl Ailsa,” he whispered. A small smile flickered across his lips.
“Thanks to you,” she said. “How did you find me?”
“Simple. I just followed the trouble. It seems to follow you wherever you go,” he grinned. But his eyes fluttered like he was falling asleep. “Njord ordered them to follow you into the mist, and I trailed behind them to make sure you were safe.”
“But why? Why did you trade your life for mine?”Because I am the Tether.The only reason any of them were trying to protect her.
“Because if you were my daughter,” he corrected her thoughts. “I’d hope someone would do the same.”
Ailsa held back a horde of tears behind her eyes, and she shook her head at the elfin. “But your family… You were so close to seeing them again. No power inside of me could have been worth giving them up.”
“Thenmakemy sacrifice worth it, Ailsa. Make sure your father, your sisters…” His breath caught in his throat, and he coughed back a wet sound. “All those who gave their life today. Make sure they did not die in vain.”
“But how? I don’t even know what I’m tethered to!” she argued, but her fight was silenced, feeling cold fingers cover her trembling hand.
“Trust Vali.” Sorrin offered a tired smile.
Ailsa shook her head. “I hate him.”
“No, you don’t,” he said. And although she wanted to protest, to remind Sorrin how much Vali had taken from her, she knew better than to argue with a dying man. He squeezed her hand gently in his own before speaking again. “Don’t waste your days holding grudges. Hatred and anger drain us of precious moments, rob us of waiting joy. You have a good heart, Miss Ailsa, use it to see the best in others, even if they hide their goodness far beneath the surface.”
“But the good could never outweigh the bad, Sorrin. It’s too much—"
“Adversity is the heat that forges the strongest bonds. Good luck. And tell my girls I’ll be in the Light that surrounds them for eternity.”
Ailsa held him until his breaths turned agonal and the life finally faded from his eyes, stroking his face some time after he passed. She pulled his head into her stomach and grieved him, letting her tears fall like rain into the earth and water the shrouded forest with her mourning. Only when she was drained of her grief did she slip from beneath his body. Ailsa hated leaving his body behind with the Vanir, but she had no choice. He belonged to the Tree now, and if she did not want to follow him into the afterlife, she needed to find her way back to Vali.
Trust Vali.
She would honor Sorrin’s final wish, even if it went against every instinct in her body. And although he was a murderer and whole host of unsavory things, he was all she had left. He was the only one who cared even a fraction for her life for the time being. As much as she hated to admit it, they shared a common goal—and now a common enemy.
She stumbled into the never-ending mist, hoping beyond the boundaries of her faith she was walking in the right direction. There were no landmarks marking the way back to Vali, only the desperate tug of her heart propelling her forward.
* * *
After seemingly hours of drifting,Ailsa collapsed against a tree and pulled her knees into her chest. Her breaths were labored, a sharp whistle partnered each inhale. The blood on her hands was now sticky from the fog. A bitter cold from the dampness clung to her skin and seeped deep into her bones, and her leather shoes were starting to fray against the rough terrain.
She was scared, tired, starving, and hurt. She was lost in a completely different realm far beyond the only home she’d ever known. Her wolven was gone, the last family she had missing to her because of her impulsiveness. But she was too lost on her own, wandering aimlessly through the misty borders of the Tree of Life, to have the opportunity to think of anyone but herself.
Thoughts of her cliff side came to mind as she sat there against the ash tree, weeping tearless cries as the memories of Erik and Ziggy—even Nikros—rushed through her mind. How simple her old life had been, where she never had to kill anyone and gods and fae were just words spoken over a bonfire after a late springtime feast. How ungrateful had she been for her boring life, thinking simplicity was insignificant.
This is what you asked for.
“Fuck you, forest,” she answered the trees. “This isnotwhat I asked the fates for when I said I wanted an adventure.”
What you want and what you need are not one in the same.
“Oh, and I needthis?”She gestured around herself.
You have great power within you, Ailsa Ledgersdottir. Stop standing in your own way.
Ailsa sighed and rested her head against the smooth grains of the trunk. She had officially hit rock bottom, arguing with a forest.
If you need help, ask for it.
She released a wicked laugh. “I need help!”
But the forest did not answer this time. She kicked a root with the heel of her flat and muttered a curse. “Somehelpyou are.”