“I’m here. You’re safe now,” he whispers softly, like speaking to a wounded animal.
Safe?I’ll never be safe after what I did, but just having him here is enough for now. I bury my face against his neck and let out a long, almost painful wail. Why is this happening? Why is it happening to me? What did I ever do to deserve any of this?
Another man’s voice meets my ears. “He’s in here. She really did a number on him.”
“Would you think before you speak?” Lucas sneers at the guy before he gathers me up in his arms. He stands up while holding me against his chest, and all I can do is lean into him.
I drape my arms around his neck and close my eyes, finally resting for the first time since I woke up in this terrible place. I don’t even know for sure where I am. I only know I never want to return here.
“What’s going to happen?” My question is muffled against his shoulder, but he understands me.
“Right now, we’re going to my brother’s. We’ll get you taken care of there. Don’t worry about anything.”
“But Nathaniel—”
“He’ll be taken care of.” He leaves it at that, and honestly, I don’t want to know anything else.
I only hope he means it when he says I have nothing to worry about. That he’ll take care of me because I want to believe him more than anything.
I don’t know how long we wait in the car before leaving, nor how long it takes to get to Lucas’s brother’s house. I only know Lucas clutches me to him all through the ride. I’m safe now. I’m with him, and nothing will hurt me. I don’t even know how he tracked me or found me. I only know he did.
And somewhere in the back of my mind, I hope he’s not going to end up paying for what I did—or rather, for helping me get out of there and away with it.
I must doze off because all of a sudden, Lucas gently shakes me awake. “We’re here. I’m going to take you up to my room and get you washed up, all right? Do you want anything to eat?”
I only shake my head. My stomach couldn’t handle anything right now.
My thoughts are a never-ending fishbowl. That monster was going to rape me, and if I fought back, he would’ve beaten me before raping me even worse. I might not have lived through it.
All I can do is remind myself that I had to protect myself. It was the only thing I could do, even if it still feels like somebody else did it. Like I stepped into somebody else’s life, and Lucas is carrying someone else into what I can only tell is a very big house. I’m not interested in what it looks like or anything like that. I only want to hide and never show my face again.
A woman’s voice is somewhere nearby, murmuring questions at a low volume. She sounds relieved, whoever she is. My face is still pressed against Lucas, so I don’t get a good look at her. He carries me up a long flight of stairs and down a long hallway before we come to a stop.
I open one eye, peering over his shoulder at the inside of a very big, luxurious bathroom. “I’ll run you a bath,” he explains before setting me down on the edge of the tub. “Get undressed.” I do it mechanically, and I’m glad to. Now that I’m looking at myself in full light, and my brain isn’t frozen in shock, I notice the blood splatters across my chest.
He didn’t drop right away. The memory is still fresh in my mind.
He staggered a little, and I backed away in horror when his arms lifted. His hands were curled into claws like he wanted to wrap them around my throat and squeeze the life out of me. He fell before he got the chance.
The memory evaporates into the air, and I notice steam rising from the surface of the water and bubbles floating on top in the bathtub. I get in without hardly feeling the temperature and only shrug when Lucas asks if it’s comfortable. I must still be in shock, or at least numb. If this is how bad I feel when I’m numb, how much worse is it going to get when the feeling wears off?
“Just sit back and let me take care of you.”
I hardly recognize him, kneeling beside the tub, dipping a washcloth into the water before dragging it over my shoulder. There’s nothing sexual about the way he touches me, but he’s not rough about it either. He takes his time, and my muscles eventually start to relax between his gentle touches and the heat of the water.
“I really didn’t mean to do it.” I wait until he looks at me. His blue eyes pierce the deepest depths of my soul. I couldn’t lie to him at this moment, even if I wanted to. “I didn’t. It just happened. He was going to—”
“I know what he was going to do. Remember, I visited that brothel. I spoke to him. I have a very good idea of what he had in mind.” He dips the cloth into the water before easing me forward to wash my back.
“You don’t blame me?” It matters so much. He can’t blame me. I don’t think I could handle it if he did.
“Not in the slightest.” His voice is tight, flat, and serious. “So get that idea out of your head.”
It’s like magic, the way his words unlock the tightness in my chest. I let out a long sigh that ends in a strangled sob. It feels good. Cleansing. Like I’m letting go of all the pain held inside.
The water’s a little cooler by the time he decides I’m clean. I stand, and he wraps me in a towel before helping me out of the tub. I don’t even have to dry myself off. He takes care of it for me, rubbing me down in long, gentle strokes without saying a word or looking me in the eye.
His expression is of a man focused on his task. I don’t know what he’s thinking, but at least I know he’s not blaming me for killing an important man.